Contentment - Deepstash

Contentment

The more you desperately want to be happy and loved, the lonelier and more afraid you become, regardless of those who surround you.

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Sometimes it’s best to give things some space.

“Wanting positive experience is a negative experience; accepting negative experience is a positive experience.“ – Mark Manson

It’s the idea that the more you pursue feeling better all the time, the less satisfied you become, as pursuing something only reinforces the fact that you lack it in the first place.

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The more you desperately want to be rich, the more poor and unworthy you feel, regardless of how much money you actually make.

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The more you desperately want to be sexy and desired, the uglier you come to see yourself, regardless of your actual physical appearance.

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The most important thing we can give any situation is space, room to breath. In addition to lowering stress and expectations, it also gives our minds some freedom.

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The more you want to be spiritually enlightened, the more self-centered and shallow you become in trying to get there.

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It seems to me, that the less I care about something, the better I am at it. When I don’t care if the beautiful woman is into me, I’m more authentic and conversations are effortless. When I have enough work, I keep getting offered more work. When I’m not concerned about messing up during a musical performance and just let it rip, I play better than I thought possible.

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RELATED IDEAS

The ‘Backwards Law’

When we expect something positive and have a desire for something good, that very experience of want, or to covet, is in a way, a negative experience for us.

Referred to as the ‘Backwards Law’ by the modern philosopher Alan Watts, pursuing something only reinforces the fact that you lack the same right now.

Example: The more we want to be rich, the more we realize that we aren’t rich, and the feeling of lack and unworthiness comes to the surface, even if you are otherwise not poor at all.

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Learning A New Skill

Learning a new skill can be one of the most satisfying things you can do to grow. Learning a new skill is not just a financialy smart decision, but it is also good for your mental health. When you learn new skills, you feel more powerful. New neural connection are formed in your brain when you learn something new. The best way to change your life is to change your mind. And learning new skills is the best way to change your mind, literally. 

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Success And Happiness
  • The traits that make us successful in our careers aren’t optimized for happiness.
  • Sacrificing the present for a better tomorrow, toiling hard with a single-minded focus isn’t exactly fun. Let’s face it, success and happiness are two different things.
  • Happiness is something that is only felt in the present moment, and meditation is a way to reach that mindset permanently.

Success is just one of the outcomes of the process of pursuing one’s goal.

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