Fear of rejection - Deepstash
Fear of rejection

Fear of rejection

The main reason why we are having a hard time declining other people's requests is that we are afraid to be rejected. We are afraid that people might think negatively. It's a heavy burden to carry because with the urge to say yes also comes a lack of self-confidence and self-value.

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MORE IDEAS FROM How to Stop Saying Yes When You Want to Say No

  • Saying No Doesn’t Mean You’re a Bad Person: Saying no doesn't mean that you are being rude, selfish, or unkind. These are all unhelpful beliefs that make it hard to say no. Learning where these beliefs have come from is a great way to learn to let go of them.
  • Knowing Your Value:  Learning to say no is realizing that you are valuable and choosing your own opinion about yourself over others.
  • Is It Really Worth It?: Learning to say no is also deciding if saying yes is really worth it. Think about the anguish, stress, and resentment that saying yes has caused you. Wouldn't it be so much easier and straightforward to just say no in the first place?

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  • Be direct.
  • Don't apologize and give all sorts of reasons.
  • Be honest.
  • Don't delay your response.
  • Be polite.
  • Practice saying no. This will get you feeling a lot more comfortable with saying no.
  • Know your worth. Don't mind what other think of you.

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RELATED IDEA

 Judgment is subjective

You can decide to interpret rejection as evidence of someone’s perception rather than as evidence of your flawed nature.

The area rug that is beautiful to your best friend might be hideous to you, and that’s okay. Everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion, but an opinion doesn’t determine whether a rug is truly pretty or ugly. The rug just is.

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You have to be able to say NO

You have to be able to pick your shots. And if success doesn’t earn you the right to say NO, what kind of success is it? If you’re not strong or free enough to pass on things, are you really that strong or free? In fact, really caring about your work is a great reason to need to be able to say NO to stuff.

Just because you’re offered something that might be good for your career, that would feel good to your ego, that most people would have said YES to, doesn’t mean you have to listen to your ego and accept the offer. You can say NO. It’s easy to forget that, especially with peer pressure and FOMO, but it’s true. Saying NO is a rich feeling that’s only tangentially related to money.

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  • The Indirect “No."Say no without feeling uncomfortable by explaining the reasons why you can't.
  • The “Let me get back to you.”Buy yourself time to think if you could do it and come up of a way to say no.
  • The Conditional “Yes.”With this conditional yes, we force people to prioritize. It shows that you have other things on your plate.
  • The Direct “No.”When you have mastered saying no, you stop giving excuses and start to say no firmly. Practice makes perfect.

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