What To Do When No One Asks For Your Advice

What To Do When No One Asks For Your Advice
  • Form an advice club - this is where a group of people help each other out by consulting with each other regularly for help. This not only helps forge friendships but also reap invaluable benefits.
  • Turn the advice-giving inside out when you're facing a situation. Ask yourself: What if my friend was struggling with the same situation I'm in, what advice would I give them? Taking this perspective can help us approach the same problem with a higher level of self-confidence and insight.
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Communication

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Self-Efficacy

This is a person's confidence in their own abilities that they are able to control their own behaviors, motivation, and other social circumstances.

Many people struggle with handling insecurity and even goal strivers are plagued by it. Having a lack of self-efficacy denies us the pleasure of setting goals in the first place.

When someone comes to us for guidance and asks about what we should do in a certain situation, we give them honest advice and oftentimes, multiple choices to choose from. After we give out advice, we would then start feeling hypocritical we don't try it ourselves.

That is the Saying-Is-Believing Effect, wherein after we say something to someone else, we're more likely to believe it ourselves.

Too often we believe that whenever a person is having a hard time pushing through an obstacle we provide unsolicited advice. By doing so, we unconsciously make them feel that they are incapable or unreliable.

However, a study suggests that instead of offering unsolicited advice, we should instead encourage them to share their own wisdom to convey that they're intelligent, capable, and the kind of person who can succeed.

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RELATED IDEAS

  • The Gratitude Journal: Simply write about something that you’re grateful for.
  • Morning Pages: Before starting work each day, write 3 pages, long-hand, of anything that crosses your mind, to clear your head.
  • The Goal Journal: Incorporating your goals into a daily journal is a huge step to getting them done.
  • The Values Journal: Identify the values that are important to you. Then write about how the events of your day connect back to your values.
  • The Curiosity Journal: Challenge yourself to write about one thing every day that made you stop and ask a question.

The Productive Benefits of Journaling (plus 11 ideas for getting started)

doist.com

A raise
... is a recognition that you’re now contributing at a higher level than when your salary was last set. 

A raise isn’t a favor or a gift; it’s a way for employers to pay fair market value for your work and to keep you around because otherwise you’re eventually going to want to find a different job that does pay you competitively.

How to Ask for a Raise

thecut.com

Only give advice when asked

Unsolicited advice sends a message that you're jumping in because they can't handle the problem. It leaves them feeling less competent and capable, undermining their ability to handle the situation themselves. 

To ensure that your advice is more helpful than harmful, only share it if you're explicitly asked.

How to Give Great Advice

entrepreneur.com

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