We've created so many distractions in our everyday environment - social media notifications, scrolling the web, socializing endlessly, shopping - that we feel like we might explode. Our hyperactive lifestyles and constant mind-chattering have forced us to develop an allergy to sitting in stillness.

Can't Live A Minute Without A Distraction

Hot boredom feels like being locked in a padded cell. You are bored, miserable and irritated. Hot <a href="https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/bored-of-your-isolation-workouts-just-dance-baby">boredom</a> is that internal groan when you’re in line at the DMV or stuck on the <a href="https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/how-to-get-some-sleep-in-an-airport">airport</a> tarmac, and your <a href="https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/cardio-iphone-distraction">phone</a> dies and there’s not a <a href="https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/t-pain-cocktail-book">book</a>, magazine or any source of distraction within reach. At its worst, it can feel almost physically painful.

Hot Boredom Defined

<ul><li>Hot boredom is a common struggle people encounter when they first try to meditate.</li><li>A big part of getting past it is learning to sit with that discomfort, instead of fighting it.</li><li>Don't resist it because when we allow for hot boredom to exist, we give ourselves the possibility of transiting to the spaciousness of cool boredom.</li></ul>In order to move beyond hot boredom, you have to feel it burn a bit first.

Hot Boredom Is An Obstacle In Your Journey

productivity

Productivity

personaldevelopment

Personal Development

timemanagement

Time Management

What Is ‘Hot Boredom,’ and Do I Have It?

When you're overloaded with work/parenting/caring/domestic admin/stuff to faff around with on your phone, it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking that every second is accounted for.<ul><li>Spending time doing whatever you want will help you get everything else done; that it's not selfish, but actually practical.</li><li>Set aside 20 minutes each morning for yourself.</li></ul>Try to do nothing. It is rewarding, to just do nothing for a short while at least.

How to Microdose Your 'Me Time'

<ul><li>Take a break if it’s something you enjoy.</li><li>Work is not the only thing we do in life - taking a break gives us our humanity.</li><li>Don't worry whether you’re wasting time or using it well, just enjoy it.</li><li>Set your alarm half an hour before your kids wake so you can sit and read or listen to music without interrupting them.</li></ul>

Doing Nothing Is Okay

<ul><li>If you don’t schedule those 20 minutes, it will take effort and willpower to try to make it happen, and finding that time will become a hassle.</li><li>To make it work, you’ll need to schedule your entire day.</li><li>Do not wait until the alarm goes off to decide what to do.</li><li>Prepare what you'll need the night before.</li><li>A schedule is a visual representation of how much time you have every day.</li></ul>

Make A Plan And Stick To It

<ul><li>Take five minutes and ask yourself why you struggle to make time for yourself.</li><li>Is it because you don't set healthy boundaries or are afraid of being alone with your thoughts?</li><li>Taking care of mental health can improve time management and improve your mental health, a two-way street.</li><li>Prioritize your needs,  whether it's a run, white space or sitting down with a blank sheet of paper to write down your ideas and be creative.</li></ul>

If You Are Struggling, Work Out What Is Stopping You

<ul><li>When you have cash in your hand, you can count it, it's quantifiable. But you can't see or feel time, or put a real value on it.</li><li>Because time is invisible, we have a hard time accounting for it. We always think there's going to be more time in the future, but there isn't.</li><li>If it's something that you enjoy, it is time well spent</li></ul>

Treat Time Like Cash, Not Credit

<ul><li>Solitude is a lovely word. It means being alone but not lonely.</li><li>Simple things like listening to music or looking at art can be just as important as meditation.</li><li>Some people find solitude very rewarding and enjoyable, while others are not looking for it. </li><li>Don't be alone, just be in a positive aloneness for a while and see how a blossoming happens.</li></ul>

Solitude: Be In Aloneness

Finding time to do what you want to do can seem impossible. But what if it was less than half an hour a day? Here’s how to microdose your ‘me time’

mindfulness

Mindfulness

Gimme 20! How just 20 minutes a day to yourself could transform your life

“Keep on starting and finishing will take care of itself.”

Procrastination is a mechanism for coping with the anxiety associated with starting or completing any task or decision.Certain tasks make us feel anxious. As a strategy for coping with this anxiety, many of us have developed a habit of procrastinating: put off the task and you’ll experience relief of tension and anxiety.Procrastination isn’t the cause of our problems. It’s simply a learned coping mechanism for dealing with deeper issues, mainly different fears, such as fear of judgment, fear of disapproval, fear of failure, and so on.

Procrastination: a learned coping mechanism

There are always activities that we willingly dive into with enthusiasm.Habits are learned when an activity is instantly followed by a reward. Procrastination is rewarding because it provides temporary relief from our stress and anxiety. We use procrastination to achieve 3 things:<ul><li>Express resentment or resistance toward authorities and our sense of powerlessness.</li><li>Avoid the fear of failure or disappointment, which often comes from perfectionism and self-criticism.</li><li>Avoid our fear of success.</li></ul>

No one is an absolute procrastinator

“If early training has caused you to associate work with pain and humiliation, then just approaching an intimidating or unpleasant task can bring on a reliving of criticism, not only from your current boss but from parents, previous bosses, and teachers. Every insecurity bubbles up to your consciousness as you think about working on some project you feel you’re no good at. Pain, resentment, hurt, and fear of failure have become associated with certain kinds of tasks.”

The easiest way to procrastinate less and boost productivity is to keep a log of how you spend your time. So for a few days, simply record exactly how you’re spending every minute of your day. This will alert you to many areas of inefficiency and lost time.

Log your time

<ul><li>You give a task the power to determine your worth and happiness</li><li>You use perfectionism to raise the stakes of a mistake. You make it seem that any mistake equals death</li><li>You feel frozen with anxiety because your natural threat assessment system produces adrenaline to deal with threats to you</li><li>You use procrastination to escape your dilemma</li><li>Finally, you use a real threat such as a deadline to overcome your fears and start the task.</li></ul>

Stages of anxiety and procrastination

“In order to maximize your performance in a stressful world, you must create a protected and indisputable sense of worth for yourself. Until you do, energy and concentration will be drained from work and put into preparing for imagined threats to your survival, and into procrastination as a means of coping."

When you catch yourself worrying, prepare yourself for that danger. Once you know you’re ready for the worst-case scenario, you’ll calm down and be able to get to work.Consider these questions:<ul><li>What is the worst that could happen?</li><li>What would I do if the worst really happened?</li><li>How would I lessen the pain and get on with as much happiness as possible if the worst did occur?</li><li>What alternatives would I have?</li><li>What can I do now to lessen the probability of this dreaded event occurring?</li><li>Is there anything I can do now to increase my chances of achieving my goal?</li></ul>

Use worrisome thoughts as action triggers

We are more likely to be productive when we can anticipate pleasure and success rather than isolation and anxiety in our work.To minimize procrastination, structure your rewards such that you will be motivated to start on the task each day.Enjoying guilt-free play is part of a cycle that will lead you to higher levels of quality, creative work. Schedule for guilt-free play. This will give you a sense of freedom over your life and will allow you to settle more easily into short and focused periods of quality work.

Guilt-free play

The self-talk of procrastinators suggests and reinforces feelings of burden, victimhood, and resistance to authority. Learning to challenge and replace negative internal dialogue helps you free yourself from attitudes that may currently be holding you back.<ul><li>Replace ‘I have to’ with 'I choose to.’</li><li>Replace ‘I must finish’ with ‘When can I start?’</li><li>Replace ‘This project is so big and important” with ‘I can take one small step.’</li><li>Replace ‘I must be perfect’ with ‘I can be perfectly human.’</li><li>Replace ‘I don’t have time to play’ with 'I must take time to play.’</li></ul>

Change how you talk to yourself

It is a time-planning method developed to tackle many procrastination-related problems.Instead of scheduling the very thing you’re procrastinating on (work), you first schedule fixed commitments (e.g., meals, commute, sleep), self-care activities (e.g., meditation, exercise), and guilt-free play (e.g., socializing, hobbies). In fact, you never even schedule work. It only goes on your schedule once you’ve spent at least 30 minutes of focused, quality time working. And it only happens in-between fixed commitments, self-care activities, and play.

The unschedule

“Working in the flow state or in the zone removes the emotional need to procrastinate and accelerates your progress toward your goals.”

A round-up of useful sources to refer to when willpower gets low.

books

Books

problemsolving

Problem Solving

Beat Procrastination

Learn how to overcome procrastination and enjoy guilt-free play! One of the most effective programs to combat procrastination, THE NOW HABIT has sold over 100,000 copies, has been translated into 11 languages, and is now revised and updated. Featuring a new introduction and a new section providing strategies to understand and deal with the role technology plays in procrastination today, THE NOW HABIT offers a comprehensive plan to help readers lower their stress and increase their time to enjoy guilt-free play. Dr. Fiore’s techniques will help any busy person start tasks sooner and accomplish them more quickly, without the anxiety brought on by the negative habits of procrastination and perfectionism.

Understand yourself and those around you.

psychology

Psychology

habits

Habits

Learn how to overcome procrastination and enjoy guilt-free play!  One of the most effective programs to combat procrastination, THE NOW HABIT has sold over 100,000 copies, has been translated into 11 languages, and is now revised and updated. Featuring a new introduction and a new section providing strategies to understand and deal with the role technology plays in procrastination today, THE NOW HABIT offers a comprehensive plan to help readers lower their stress and increase their time to enjoy guilt-free play. Dr. Fiore’s techniques will help any busy person start tasks sooner and accomplish them more quickly, without the anxiety brought on by the negative habits of procrastination and perfectionism.

Neil Fiore is an accomplished writer whose work has resonated with readers around the world. Neil Fiore has published several books that explore a range of topics, from fiction to nonfiction, and has received critical acclaim for the ability to weave compelling narratives. Neil Fiore's writing style is known for its depth and authenticity, and has earned quite a loyal following of readers.

Neil Fiore

The Now Habit

The concept of work life balance basically views work and life as 2 separate parts of our life that need to be maintained equally. In a much broader sense, it means to utilise more time for leisure things, family time or simply self care. It is something which many youths, including myself, struggle with. It’s difficult to find a space that is just the right balance of work and leisure.

Introduction To Work-life Balance 0

The reason why work-life balance has become such a growing topic in discussions among the self-help and self-care community is because the “constant hustle” cultre has fixed the idea of constantly being on the go, working and being productive into the workforce and has made it the norm.This has built the toxic idea in most workplace employees that they should be constantly on the go and hustling, being productive instead of taking time off for themselves and doing things that they love.

About work-life balance

Even if you love your job & are motivated to work, overworking yourself without taking breaks will eventually lead to some resentment – either towards yourself, your colleagues or even your job.Constantly being on the run, working even on the weekends will lead to eventual burnout – be it mentally or physically – this is what leads to resentment & negative feelings which is your mind & body’s indication to needing a break.Assuming that working harder than others will lead you to great success in your career is wrong. Yes, it might help to get ahead, but at the cost of your own well being.

<ul><li>Define </li></ul>Before going into work-life balance, you need to know what is ‘balance’ for you.Write down the things in your life that are priorities, then analyse your life daily life and try to make an estimate on how much time you’re able to allot to each priority.Then take a moment to reflect on that.Are you happy with that? What would you like to change? How much of a change do you want? How will that change your life?

Tips to maintain work-life balance

<ul><li>Set Schedules </li></ul>When you realise how you want your day-to-day life to be organized it becomes easier to schedule your day accordingly.Set a fixed schedule for workdays with fixed times for work and fun things that you enjoy .When you have a fixed schedule, especially one that is more or less consistent throughout all workdays, it becomes much easier to get into that ‘flow’ state of work and enjoy uninterrupted work times. Also helps you detangle yourself from work after a specific time and just enjoy other things.

Now, it might seem easy to fix a schedule and plan out your entire day, but the difficult part is sticking to that workplan and being consistent with it. Especially as someone like me who doesn’t fit well with schedules and hates being routine, it gets boring.

Cons To This

<ul><li>Turn Off </li></ul>Turn off work mode – both, from your devices and your head.Turn off work and email notifications. If possible, turn off devices and spend time doing the things that make you happy or spend time with people that make you happy.It’s important to not let work distract you during times that are supposed to be your ‘off’ times. Obviously this won’t work for you if you have a job that requires you to be on alert most of the times.But for a student plus writer like me, it’s easy to shut off my phone and go out on a walk or read or study my favourite subjects.

<ul><li>Make Boundaries </li></ul>When you have a schedule and fixed times for everything, there is only that limited time for you to work and to relax. It’s important to learn to maintain that boundary between your work and your personal life. Learn to not bring your work into your personal space, to give time to people outside of the work environment and maintain balance.The way to achieve this balance is from within, it is a resultant of your own choices and it’s important for you to make wise decisions and respect the boundary that you have created for yourself.

If you are someone like me who finds it difficult to work within boundaries,it’s going to be a difficult task to navigate through them and be disciplined, but the only way to have successful work-life balance is by execution- simply learn to work within boundaries and stick to your routine.

Cons To This 

<ul><li>Reflect </li> </ul>After atleast a month of following through, go back to analysing your daily life. Ask yourself the same questions you asked yourself in the first step. Are your answers different now? Do you feel more happy/content with the way your work-life balance is now? Observe and reflect on your emotions before and after and see if things have changed.

<ul><li>Work-life balance is based on the idea that work and life are 2 different parts of our life that need to be maintained equally. It creates this barrier between work and life and puts a pressure on people to be able to manage both equally and successfully. </li><li>But the reality of the situation is that work and life can never be equally balanced in life. </li></ul>

Cons to work-life balance

<ul><li>There will be times when you will have to make certain decisions based off of your professional life and that takes priority in your everyday life. </li><li>There will also be times when your personal life will take the spotlight and you will set your work away to enjoy your life with people you love or just do things to keep yourself happy. </li></ul>

So when it is clear that having a perfect work-life balance isn’t possible and yet we pressurise ourselves to live that way, it is just like running a race but in the opposite direction to everyone else – you might feel like you’re winning when in reality you’re making decisions that will not benefit you. It’s important to accept that the idea of perfect work-life balance is not correct. Accept that you cannot treat things as rigid blocks, sometimes things are just grey

Work-life integration removes the idea of having a perfectly balanced equation between work and life and blends everything together.To be precise, it removes the rigid boundaries between your personal and professional life and sets your day in such a way that work, health, family, self, everything is given appropriate attention but without the strict regimes and schedules.It is a way of creating a collaboration between many areas of your life.

Work-life integration

With the added flexibility to your life, it becomes easier to manage work and personal life and if you feel like adding more things to your life, you can easily do that.It gives the opportunity to be professional while handling many things at the same time and still remain sane !

Pros Of Work-life Integration 

<ul><li>Create a schedule that focuses on all the main priorities in your life. Unlike schedules from work-life balance that dealt with ensuring ‘equlibrium’ between work and life on almost a daily basis, these schedules are based more on what you feel like and what you’re motivated to do</li><li>For example – one day I might be in the mood to study and write and instead of going out with friends i would just stay at home and read a book or draw. </li><li>The next day I might not be in the mindset to study, so I could spend time with friends and family.</li><li>It’s a way to balance your life,but in a way that suits you.</li></ul>

Tips to work-life integration

<ul><li>The only thing to keep in mind is to make sure that your schedule distributes time to all your priorities in a more or less equal amount and fulfills you and the people most important to you.</li><li>Just like in work-life balance situations, it’s important to have boundaries here as well, but not as strict/rigid.</li><li>Here you don’t have to set times in your day reserved only for work and only for fun. You only have a brief blueprint of how much time you want to spend working and how much on leisure things.</li><li>You just need to try and not let the two (work and fun) overlap and keep them at a distance.</li></ul>

Tips... 

<ol><li>If you don’t spread your priorities out equally, you might end up spending most of your time either working or on leisure things.</li><li>You may not be able to properly navigate through the blend of work and life and might lose the grip on maintaining balance between the two.</li><li>You may have your mind constantly preoccupied with other things due to lack of proper scheduling of thoughts and work times.</li></ol>

Cons to work-life integration

Having work-life balance is an important thing.. or is it? Here is debate about the pros and cons of work-life balance and a slightly better option. 

remotework

Remote Work

career

Career

Work-Life Balance?

It might sound counterintuitive. When you want to move ahead in life, hit them goals. Buy that dream house, car or that new phone. Everyone is in such a rush to reach to a place where we feel accomplished, loved, cared, satisfied. Only to realise it is start of another peak.Let the realisation creep in, we are not telling ourselves to stop. It is a sign to slow down. Put car on the side line, press the parking light, check the left and the rights, check the google map, ask a passing stranger.“Are we headed in the right direction?”

Slow down To go faster

If you are go to reply to everything that needs to be done. Be it exercise, family or friends time, community time or even sleep is “ I am busy”. My friend we are suffering from the same thing, disease called “I am busy”It makes us feel engaged, no time to think, wonder, question because we have better things to do. That is being busy. Give yourself the freedom to have some quality rest. Take the walk in the park. Read that book with a cup of coffee and morning sun. Unless you are Putin and working to end the war, you can take the break .

A pandemic called: “I am busy”

Research shows we have recessing attention span. Don’t even need to quote it. Check your temptation to do something else while reading this small post. Did you switched tabs? Did you check the phone which have no notifications? Did you opened mail box to see any new mails or on Whatsapp.When you stand in a line and open your phone just to be engaged for that small pause. Did some life changing opportunity just walked past because you missed to check your phone? Ever ?Those millions notifications are better left unheard. Learn to sit idle. Learn to be idle.

Hello Attention span, bye

Sometimes you need to take a step back to make the jump

It might sound counterintuitive. When you want to move ahead in life, hit them goals. Buy that dream house, car or that new phone. When you seek that elusive tag in the organisation which helps you…

health

Health

Un-offical Guide to go faster :   “Slow down”

“What starts as an excuse can easily become a habit.Don't let a bad day become a lifestyle.”

“Life is a series of seasons, and what works in one season may not work in the next.What season are you in right now? What habits does that season require?”

“Awareness is often enough to motivate change.Simply tracking your food intake will motivate you to alter it. Merely writing down your problems may spark ideas for possible solutions.The process starts with seeing reality clearly.”

“I always forget how important the empty days are, how important it may be sometimes not to expect to produce anything, even a few lines in a journal. A day when one has not pushed oneself to the limit seems a damaged, damaging day, a sinful day. Not so! The most valuable thing one can do for the psyche, occasionally, is to let it rest, wander, live in the changing light of a room.”

“The secret to feeling great about yourself is not to be found in searching for people who are less than you and then show yourself superior to them, but in searching for people who are more than you and then show yourself worthy of their company.”

Write down all the projects you are working on right now. What is the one thing that, if you had the courage to eliminate it entirely, would make all the others easier?

1 QUESTION FOR YOU

motivationandinspiration

Motivation & Inspiration

3-2-1: Life's seasons, the importance of rest, and the secret to feeling great about yourself

Motivational energy from achieving goals, dreams and desire fulfillment.Emotional energy from trust of friends and family.Intellectual energy from practicing mindfulness, experience and knowledge.Physical energy obtained from good sleep, exercise and recovery.

Energy- Feeling Of Capacity

You probably came across development and self help books which talk about motivation and life goals.If you are tired on physical level you don't have energy on emotional and intellectual challenges.

Things that are Important but not the Core.

Physical recovery is a science that nobody talks about, only professional athletes know how important it is.

Interlink Of Various Energy.

Think of your body as a car you used to move through life. It's the only guide you have you can't sell it to replace it. How far you get in life and how quickly you get there depends on how well you take care of your car.If you are not scheduling regular oil change and maintenance, you'll find yourself as disrepair.

Life Is Like The Only Car

1. Keep Moving: studies show we are better when we exercise. Without the movement the car rusts, similarly without moment you feel demotivated and exhausted.2. Take breaks: our bodies are not designed to work 8 hr straight. Take atleast 15mins break in an hr.3.Sleep: it s the absolute minimum you owe your body everyday. Its like daily energy recovery.4. Fuel: you can't put any fuel in your ka do you really think your body is okay with junk food and soda. So eat healthy conciously, not just for yourself but totake care of your brain and body.

Want To Avoid Breakdown

You need to give a chance to your body to recover.

If You Are Tired

Like you take your car to repair shop or wash.Remember recovery is active not passive. Lying on bed and watching tv won't nelp, pur body needs change. Take a walk in park, get a massage, go to yoga class, meditate.Find your way that suits you.Find a stress and energy measurements to track which energy recovery techniques suits you.

What Is The Best Way To Recover

Physical recovery is a science nobody talks about. Only professional athletes know how important it is. Time management may seem like the right solution when you can’t get everything you need done, but it won’t help if you’re exhausted. Energy is the feeling of capability. More detailed information is available on our website: https://welltory.com

Manage your energy, not your time.

Even if you work for others, do it as if it is your own business. Talk to your clients the same way your boss would do, when he’s at his best.

Own your work

Not only will this make you happy but also achieve better for the business you work for.

Stand up for work that matters 

Spend 80% of your time doing 20% of the work that produces 80% of the results

Eat that frog!

Chances are that most (if not all) our favorite distractions are right at our fingertip these days. Another good work habit to have is to <a href="https://ysamphy.com/iphone-configurations-and-apps-for-productivity/">set up your phone to work for you</a>, instead of against you.


Set up your smartphone to work for you, not against you!

You need to build your focus muscle by making it a habit to turn off notifications during most of your workday. Just like you should <a href="https://ysamphy.com/guide-to-email-productivity-post/">schedule email time</a>, consider checking your communication apps only twice a day: once at 11:30 a.m. and another one at 5:00 p.m.

Work without digital distractions

Research found that almost half of our interruptions are self-initiated, so it's important to note it, name it, and nail it.

Become indistractable

Dealing with distraction is only part of the equation. The ability to focus is a must-have work habit for elite performers.

Train your focus muscle

Most people prioritize tasks on their schedule when in fact, a better way is to schedule your priority. The things on your schedules are usually someone else’s priority, not yours.

Schedule the priority

<a href="https://www.ysamphy.com/top-time-management-tips-and-techniques/">Effective time management</a> is a crucial work habit to have for elite performers. Their working hours are usually planned.

Master time management

If you are not well organized, it makes it difficult to find the focus necessary to produce the quality outcome you desire.

Be well organized

“Your mind is for having ideas, not holding them.”

All of us plan and prioritize all the time, but it is better to get our tasks off our head.

Use a to-do list

Ask yourself this questions: What usually distracts you from doing your important tasks? Mindless snacking? Social media? Web browsing? News reading? A chat with your colleagues? Add them to your not to do list.

Use a not-to-do list to avoid distractions

Daily and weekly reviews are necessary for continuous improvement and expert performance.

Review your performance

Without proper rest and recovery, you can’t perform at your best. Meditation relaxes your mind and body. Research shows that when our brain is resting, it engages its “default network” to continue problem-solving, examine possibilities, and look for relevant information.

Practice meditation and mindfulness

There are many ways we can embrace personal and professional development at work. Reading books, peer learning/sharing, personal reflection, asking questions when in doubt… These are just a few examples.

Embrace a growth mindset

We don’t rise to our level of expectations; we fall to the level of our training.

Different careers need different tools so master the tools you need for your work. Knowing how to use them can get you by, but mastering those tools will let you optimize your performance.

Master the tools necessary to perform

I wrote the article a while ago. I've now hand-picked 18 of them and hope that you will find them helpful! Do let me know what you think I should add to the list! Happy Stashing!

This is a comprehensive guide to good work habits to help you succeed in your career. Check it out if you wonder what to do at work every day

18 Habits of Highly Effective Kowledge Workers

Reading this book is like holding a genuine friend in your hands.The style in which this author goes through 'the seven personal assertions' was a much needed reality check to say the least.'This is a conversational slap from the universe to wake up to your true potential, to unfuck yourself and get spectacularly into your life'.

Get Out Of Your Head

This book requires you to seek the answer, not out there, but inside of yourself.Its not that you have to find the answer, you are the answer.

Research in neuroscience and psychology shows that the kind of talk you engage in impacts the quality of your life.Studies have continually evidenced that positive self talk can dramatically improve mood, boost confidence, increase productivity and much much more. It can be one of the key components to a happy, successful life.The reverse is also true that negative self talk can put us in a bad mood and leave us feeling helpless. It makes small problems seem bigger and creates problems which didnt exist before.Your self talk is fucking you up in ways you cant even begin to imagine.

How Language Changes Our Lives

You are what you do, not what you say you'll do.

Its this simple: in order to improve your internal world, you have to start by taking action in the external world. Get out of your mind and get into your life.

Scientists have discovered that our thoughts can actually change the structure of our brains.This phenomenon is called neuroplasticity.As we go through life experiencing and learning new things, our brains constantly arranges and rearranges the neural pathways that control how we think and behave.The best way to shape thoughts is through conscious, decisive self talk. Just like how we build habits by repeating an action until it becomes automatic, we can use strong and assertive language to create lasting change in our lives over time.You are affecting your brains very biology.

Retrain Your Brain

If all our misfortunes were laid in one common heap whence everyone must take an equal portion, most people would be content to take their own and depart.

Whatever the domain you're winning in, you'll start to realise something: you're really good at it.You really are wired to win. You can and do achieve the things you set your mind to.

When you stick to whats comfortable for you, doing the same things you've always done, your in effect living in the past - not moving forward. You are repeating behaviours that at one point in your life felt risky, but have since turned into a routine.Success is never certain and it never comes without risk. Successful people succeed because they don't let uncertainty stop them.Once you choose certainty over uncertainty, you stop achieving. Eventually we do that thing called 'settle'. We settle for certainty.The successes and experiences you've dreamed of are waiting for you in uncertainty.

A Paradigm Of Potential

You've probably noticed, when you do try to stay in your comfort zone, you never truly feel comfortable. There's always that nagging feeling that you could be doing more. There's always that desire for a life thats better than the one you have now.There really is no destination, there is only exploring, exploring and exploring.

Its all about momentum. Once you get the ball rolling, its easier to stay moving.Choose action over inaction. Act beyond your automatic thoughts.The car won't start without you putting your key in the ignition.Dont know what to do first or where to start? Great! Thats your first action! Find out. Trawl the Internet, read books, ask questions, take courses, seek advice, do whatever the eff you need to do to UNFUCK YOURSELF and get into your life.'I am not my thoughts, I am what I do'.

Action Greases The Wheel Of Life

Go against the current.People in your life have become accustomed to relating to you as a specific 'kind' of person. So any attempt to break out of that mold, you're not only messing with your own world, you're also messing with theirs.The resistance comes from your mind, not just from other people. Both your conscious and subconscious thoughts can work against you to stop your dreams right in their tracks.

Be Relentless 

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit at home and think about it. Go out and get busy.

How do we recognise our hidden expectations? The answer is in the places in your life where you experience disappointment, resentment, regret, suppression, anger, lethargy, essentially anywhere that leaves you feeling deflated like you have lost your self.The greater the gap between your hidden expectations and your reality, the worse you will feel.When you expect nothing, you're living in the moment, embracing the situation you're in.Own the situation and be in charge of it. When you take ownership and responsibility for it, that is when you can change it.

Hidden Expectations

Don't seek to have events happen as you wish, but wish them to happen as they do happen, and all will be well with you.

There will always be people who will lie and cheat. Its just not healthy for your self to live in the expectation that they won't, and then throw a hissy fit when they do. Remember, in most cases, you will always end up worse off than they do! Much worse.You end up sticking yourself with resentment, regret, anger and frustration. Remember, you are doing this to yourself!Accept things for what they are. Become masterful with your mind and your emotional state. Quieten your mind and allow yourself to act with power rather than succumbing to your internal and external upsets.

Expect Nothing, Accept Everything

Love the life you have, not the one you expected to have.'I expect nothing and accept everything'.

Stay out of the swamp of mediocrity and drama, reach for your greatest self, your greatest potential, and challenge yourself to live that life every single day of it.

Joining the ranks of The Life-Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, You Are a Badas*, and F*ck Feelings comes this refreshing, BS-free, self-empowerment guide that offers an honest, no-nonsense, tough-love approach to help you move past self-imposed limitations. Are you tired of feeling fu*ked up? If you are, Gary John Bishop has the answer. In this straightforward handbook, he gives you the tools and advice you need to demolish the slag weighing you down and become the truly unfu*ked version of yourself. ''Wake up to the miracle you are,'' he directs. ''Here's what you've forgotten: You're a fu*king miracle of being.'' It isn't other people that are standing in your way, it isn't even your circumstances that are blocking your ability to thrive, it's yourself and the negative self-talk you keep telling yourself. In Unfu*k Yourself, Bishop leads you through a series of seven assertions: I am willing. I am wired to win. I got this. I embrace the uncertainty. I am not my thoughts; I am what I do. I am relentless. I expect nothing and accept everything. Lead the life you were meant to have—Unfu*k Yourself.

Unfu*k Yourself

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