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The Four Stages of Life

https://markmanson.net/four-stages-of-life

markmanson.net

The Four Stages of Life
We are born helpless. We can't walk, can't talk, can't feed ourselves, can't even do our own damn taxes. As children, the way we're wired to learn is by watching and mimicking others. First we learn to do physical skills like walk and talk.

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Life happens in 4 stages

Life happens in 4 stages
  1. Mimicry: As children, the way we’re wired to learn is by watching and mimicking others.
  2. Self-Discovery:Learning what makes us different from the people and culture around us, with a lot of trial-and-error and experimentation.
  3. Commitment: The great consolidation of one’s life. This stage is all about maximizing your own potential in this life.
  4. Legacy: Important psychologically, because it makes the ever-growing reality of one’s own mortality more bearable.

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The value of trauma

Transitions between life stages are usually triggered by extreme events: near-death experiences, divorce, failed friendships, death of loved ones.

Trauma causes us to step back and re-evaluate our deepest motivations and decisions. It allows us to reflect on whether our strategies to pursue happiness are actually working well or not.

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Options to maximize all areas of life:

  1. Outsource Burners: you can keep the burner running without spending your time on it.
  2. Embrace Constraints and try to be effective within those limits. Well des...

The Four Burners Theory

Imagine that your life is represented by a stove with four burners on it: family, friends, health, your work.

The Four Burners Theory says that “in order to be successful you have to cut off one of your burners. And in order to be really successful you have to cut off two.”

Life is made a tradeoffs

Everyone has constraints on their time and energy. And every choice has a cost. You cannot have it all. You have to choose. You can be mediocre in everything, or excel in some and ignore the rest

Don't flow with the mainstream

Don't flow with the mainstream

Moving away from analogy = Removing iterative steps based on other or older experiences and biases and prejudices

Keeping Yourself Motivated

Determination. Do something that you have willingly chosen to do. Have a sense of autonomy and self-empowerment.

Bring on companions. Shared memories and experiences are far stronger motivating factors.

Be impatient. achieve your goals as quickly as you can.

Stay curious. Do not just dream, but see the benefits for yourself.

Avoidance. Make the most out of your time and win the final pay off.

Applying the First Principles Thinking

Identify the Problem

What is something that I want to change in my life?

Deconstruct the Problem

What are the causes of my problems? How does it affect my life?

Solve the Problem

Start creating your new framework. You could think of multiple ways to achieve your goals easily.

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Structure in times of chaos

Human suffering is often about freedom and constraint. We rebel against too much containment (“I need space!”) or if we have too much freedom, we feel lost in space. Fearful. (“Where did you go?...

Move

Our bodies need to stretch, reach, twist, bend, step, and sweat. It's not about staying in shape. It's about your immune health and mental health.

Build movement in your structure. Try for at least 20 minutes per day.

Nourish

You don't have to ban small treats. However, it is essential to set up a daily structure that fills you with nourishing healthy foods.

Make a dietary change, learn to meal prep, or teach your kids to cook.