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Self-Talk
An inner voice that provides a running monologue internal chatter combining conscious thoughts and unconscious beliefs and biases, provides a way for the brain to interpret and process daily experiences.
This critical inner voice can raise awareness of internal and external obstacles to achievement. It can also take a toll on one’s confidence, fostering shame and limiting personal growth.
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Types Of Self Talk
Destructive self-talk causes you to question yourself so constantly that you can soon become paralyzed with doubt and uncertainty.
In constructive self-talk, you cheer yourself on, focus on the positive aspects of a situation, and allow yourself to feel good about what you’ve done. They insightful, thoughtfully constructed, self-reflective, and motivational in nature.
Dysfunctional self-talk is focused on the negative aspects of challenging situations rather than on their positive aspects, and had a pessimistic attitude toward change of any kind. Also termed as catastrophic self talk.
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Most Common Thought Distortions
- All-or-nothing or black-and-white thinking
- Overgeneralization—applying the results of one situation to all similar situations
- Mental filter—dwelling on one negative detail in an otherwise good experience
- Jumping to conclusions or catatrophizing—concluding the worst not necessarily substantiated by facts
- Emotional reasoning—using our emotional state as evidence of objective truth
- Magnification—exaggerating the significance of a negative event
- Personalization—assuming responsibility for a negative event not under your control
- Blame—blaming others as a way to feel more in control of a negative situation
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Rewriting your internal script
- Notice automatic thoughts. Notice the words and ideas being expressed.
- Identify distortions. See if you recognize any thought distortions or irrational beliefs like should, must, have to, ought, always, and never.
- Challenge your thoughts. This step is often the most difficult and may even require some courage to push through. Ask yourself: What is the evidence? Is there another way to view this situation? Is it in my best interest to hold this belief?
- Rewrite your thoughts. Replace the thought distortions and irrational beliefs with more accurate, constructive statements.
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8 Tips to Gain Control Over Negative Self-Talk
- Personify your inner critic. Give it a silly identity that’s outside of you so you can gain distance from it.
- Play with your thoughts like sing the self-critical thoughts or use humor and lightness by imagining a funny font.
- Remind yourself with a rubber band snap and silently say “STOP.” to come back to the present moment.
- End with an “and.” to focus on what other facts might also be true.
- Draft power statements.A power statement is a reminder that helps bring you back to your center.
- Keep a brag file of accomplishments on a daily or weekly basis.
- Create a playlist
- Give someone else a compliment
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CURATOR'S NOTE
Ideas to recognise and reframe your internal critic and negative self talk
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