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Experiencing Grief
Everyone has to experience grief at some point in life. It is an evolutionary trait that is present in mammals in general.
There seems to be a certain purpose for this internal response that we all have naturally.
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The Five Stages Of Grief
The stages of coming in terms with grief are:
- Denial
- Anger
- Bargaining
- Depression
- Acceptance
These widely accepted stages are considered rigid and obsolete as modern psychologists update the understanding of grief.
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The Attachment Theory
It focuses on the psychological connectedness of grief, looking at the quality of bondings that are made during the course of our lives.
Grief, and even the behaviour of babies in the absence of parents suggests it is not just a mental experience, but has physiological effects, like raising the level of the stress hormone cortisol in our bodies.
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Modern Science On Grief
Neuroscience can measure the brain in grief, showing that the region nucleus accumbens lights up when we are close to our loved ones, and also if we lose them.
Grief can be for all sorts of reasons, not just losing a loved one. Any world-shifting event that affects us directly or a traumatic event in our lives can shatter and disorient us. This is known as the assumptive world theory.
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Anticipatory grief
Conventional grief, the kind of grief that occurs after the loss of a loved one, or even loss of one’s dreams, is commonly discussed and understood.
Anticipatory grief is a lesser-known...
A Cauldron Of Emotions
Grief involves anger and loss of emotional control, often a state of confusion.
Anticipatory grief, for those who experience it, is sometimes even more severe and stressful. It does not lessen the burden of actual grief after the loss has been experienced, and is not a substitute for it..
Purpose of Anticipatory Grief
Anticipatory grief is a chance of closure and personal growth which comes at the end of life. It is a chance to reconcile differences and heal the heart with forgiveness.
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Losing a Loved One
Extreme grief, like losing a loved one is normally handled by an individual's support group of friends and family in stereotypical ways.
There seems to be a 'support gap' in which p...
Choose Life
The key is to choose life, and not lose the ones we have, to what we have already lost.
Accepting the good and deciding to shift towards life during matters of death is an effective psychological technique, which is referred to as 'benefit finding'.
Resilient People
Studies after the 9/11 terror attacks showed that experiencing positive emotions created a buffer against depression. Resilient people can work out ways to include hope, love, humor, pride, inspiration, serenity into their lives.
We all can use nature therapy, inspirational movies, and books, music, and sports to fuel our positive beliefs and emotions.
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Take Your Time
Breaking up can trigger chemical, emotional and physical reactions that cause you to feel lonely, unloveable, depressed, and worthless.
Instead of pushing yourself to move forward q...
Good Grief
The five stages of grief are:
- denial (inability to accept reality),
- anger (physical tension, frustration, resentment),
- bargaining (magical thinking, pleading to God),
- depression (sadness, emptiness, guilt, sleeplessness, loss of appetite, hopelessness),
- acceptance.
Become Anti-Social (Media)
Nothing good can come from looking at your ex’s Instagram stories or Facebook timeline. When it comes to social media, just say no.