How to Fight off Your Inner Critic - Deepstash

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Your inner critic

Your inner critic

We almost all have a character inside our minds that tends to visit us late at night when we're very tired, telling us terrible things in order to destroy our self-confidence and self-compassion.

Too often, we don't know how to answer back. We forget that there might be any other perspectives. We let ourselves be beaten and sink into despair. However, we should prepare one or two things to shoot back at the critic when they next come calling.

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Every story has two sides

You could tell everything as a tragedy, or you could tell an equally valid and far kinder story. You could say that you made some serious errors, as every human will, and you paid the price for them. Nevertheless, you tried to be good and loved a few people properly. Despite everything, your heart is in the right place.

The difference between hope and despair depends on the way of telling conflicting stories from the same facts.

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Your inner critic was always an outer critic

... who has been internalized. You're speaking to yourself as someone else once talked to you or made you feel.

You should acknowledge your failures and be happy to make amends. But you also have to stand back from this critic and question what they are doing in your mind. They don't have a right to walk as they wish through the rooms of your mind.

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Life's a struggle for everyone

Stop comparing what you know of your deep self to the shallow front others advertise about their lives.

Everyone seems to know how to live, but you don't. However, you don't know. We may decide what to tell and what to hide. A few people may appear to have perfect lives, but only because you don't know them well enough.

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No one knows the future

Despair presumes you know the rest of the story. You don't. Keep going; the loveliest things could happen all of a sudden.

So, if you think that things are never going to get better, stop. The truth is: you don't know.

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The fear of being alone

Concentrate on the people with very big hearts. Be honest with them about your pain - they'll find their way to you.

Thinking no one could ever love you sounds very tempting, but that can't be the truth. You've suffered, and you're honest and can be kind. That's enough for someone to stick with you.

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Thinking you're ugly

Maybe you think you're ugly. That might be true, but so are lots of people.

When you love them, you start to see their soul, and you love their character in them. You probably haven't thought about what most people you love look like.

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Cut your life up into smaller pieces

Who cares where you will be in five years? Make it to the next meal and a nice bath. If nothing terrible happens in the next hour, that is a triumph. Celebrate the peaceful next ten minutes.

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CURATED BY

ishank

Bacon scholar. Avid reader of all things self help.

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