10 Things Emotionally Intelligent People Do to Create Powerful Conversations

Start your questions with:

Who?

Why?

What?

When?

Where?

or How

If you ask, "were you terrified?" you will receive a one-word answer.

If you ask, "what was that like?" you will get a thoughtful, meaningful answer.

There will be thoughts that pop into your head; your job is to let them go.

There is no need to say everything that comes to mind, and you do not need to wait for "just the right time."

Let your thoughts come and go without judgment.

This principle is straightforward.

Be very careful talking about things that you're not an expert at.

It is better to err on the side of caution.

Pretend you'll be on the record and held accountable for your words.

Don't make things up.

If they talk about losing a loved one, don't talk about when your mom died.

If they're discussing their problems, don't discuss your own issues.

It is not always about you, so avoid bringing the conversation back to you.

Repetition is condescending and boring.

People usually do this when they have a point to make, and they say it repeatedly.

Don't do that.

It's not enjoyable for anyone.

People don't care about the years, names, dates, and times you struggle to remember.

They care about you, what you're like, what you have in common, and how you feel, not every minor detail.

Leave them out; the conversation will be much more enjoyable.

Listening is the number one skill you can learn.

But listening is hard.

We would rather talk.

Talking is easy; we're in control and the center of attention.

It takes effort to pay attention to someone.

But if you're not, then you're not having a conversation.

Be interested in others.

Keep your mouth shut as often as you can, and keep your mind open as much as you can.

When you talk to someone, be prepared to be amazed.

They have something unique, strange, or fun about them; you just have to let them share it.