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The Stress of Your Expectations vs. Reality

https://www.verywellmind.com/expectation-vs-reality-trap-4570968

verywellmind.com

The Stress of Your Expectations vs. Reality
Your expectations may be robbing you of happiness unnecessarily. Here's how to avoid setting yourself up for disappointment and to enjoy what you have.

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Why expectations hurt

Why expectations hurt

We often fantasize about the day when things will finally go our way. We have highly positive expectations of the future, but once what we expected did not match our reality we feel hurt and lost.

Expectations frustrate us when we idealize a certain future but our actions and our behavior is not in accordance to what we were expecting for. Oftentimes our behavior falls short of our standards.

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Being more appreciative of our lives

Studies have shown that we tend to disregard the things that we currently have to yearn for the things that others have that we don't.

We need to remind ourselves to be thankful for the life that we have as of the moment. If the life that you have currently is not up to par with your expectations, it is always up to us to work on ourselves and to work for the life we want.

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How social media affects our expectations

Social media is a great contributor as to why our expectations to ourselves and towards other people is damaging.

We often tend to compare ourselves with other people online regardless of who they may be. We tend to forget that we compare our worst moments to somebody else's best.

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Managing expectations

We tend to have many unrealistic expectations that are based on our highly critical comparison to other people, in order to lessen the disappointment we feel whenever we are let down we must remember to:

  1. Be realistic
  2. Remember that nobody hits the bullseye on the first try.

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Unrealistic Optimism

Unrealistic Optimism

The tendency to over-expect the probability of good things happening while negating the likelihood of anything bad happening is a common human trait.

Studies consistently ...

The Advocates for Pessimism

Pessimism, or having a bias towards a negative outcome, has a fan base too, as it seems that pessimists are immune to disappointment.

Their view of life already considers the worst possible outcome as the default one, and anything better than that can only improve it.

Loss Aversion

Losing something we already have is twice as much pain than gaining the same. This skewed feelings towards loss is known as loss aversion.

Expectations always dampen the feelings of happiness, always setting us up in advance for a dose of disappointment.

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Communicate Early And Often

An effective leader communicates early and often. 

Don't assume that your team understands your expectations. Instead, proactively communicate your expectations. Empower them to m...

Come To A Democratic Decision

The right way to set expectations is to sit down with your employees and discuss everyone’s needs and expectations. Then come to a mutually agreed solution.

Focus On The ‘What,’ Not The ‘How’

An good approach for employees to best meet expectations is to focus on “what” your desired outcome or vision is. It allows employees to feel more invested in the process toward completion.

When people feel most authentic

Everyone wants to be their true self, not a follower of social expectations.

Most people think authenticity is acting by following your individual set of values and qualities. But research ...

Feeling and being authentic

Several studies have shown that people’s feelings of authenticity are often shaped by something other than being true to their unique qualities

Paradoxically, feelings of authenticity seem to be related to a kind of social conformity. The more we conform to social conventions about how a person should act, the more authentic we feel.