deepstash
Beta
Deepstash brings you key ideas from the most inspiring articles like this one:
Read more efficiently
Save what inspires you
Remember anything
8 Conversational Habits That Kill Credibility
8
Key Ideas
Save all ideas
Using too much jargon
When you constantly take over normal words and use them in odd ways to make them sound "businessy", people will most likely roll their eyes.
Stick to using words as they're defined in the dictionary.
203 SAVES
202 READS
Clichés
Unoriginal expressions used so frequently that they've actually lost meaning like "out-of-the-box thinking" could reveal a lack of respect for the listener.
Avoid metaphors completely or use original ones. If that's too hard, tweak the wording of clichés to make them less cliché-ish.
172 SAVES
155 READS
Hiccup words
These are words or sounds you insert into sentences when you're pausing to think. Examples: 'um', 'like'. Too much of these will annoy your audience.
When you simply pause in silence, rather than trying to fill the thinking space with the hiccup, you end up sounding wise and like you're choosing your words carefully.
235 SAVES
217 READS
Upticks
They turn statements into questions: a raise of pitch at the end of the sentence or an actual phrase, like "........., you know?" or "............, eh?" They indicate that you're not confident in your communication skills.
Ask a specific question instead, such as "Does that make sense so far?"
223 SAVES
200 READS
Weasel words
These are attempts to disguise ugly facts as abstractions. Examples: using "development opportunity" when you mean "drudgery," or saying "rightsizing" when you mean "firing people." They mark you as a coward.
You'll get more respect and credibility in the long run for telling unpleasant truths than for pleasant-sounding lies.
193 SAVES
177 READS
Fake apologies
This is what people do when they feel socially obligated to apologize but they aren't really sorry. This ends up being even more offensive. Example: "I'm sorry if anybody was offended."
If you can't apologize from the heart, don't bother, because you're not really apologizing.
195 SAVES
173 READS
Spray and pray
This consists of blurting out a stream of facts or observations before finding out which ones (if any) might actually be of interest to the listener.
To avoid this, ask questions, respond to comments, figure out what's needed, and only then trot out facts and observations that are immediately relevant.
176 SAVES
173 READS
SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
3
Key Ideas
6 Components of a good apology
- Expression of regret
- Explanation of what went wrong
- Acknowledgment of responsibility
- Declaration of repentance
- Offer of repair
- Request for forgiveness
Communicate Effectively And Sincerely
The content of an apology is only half the battle. The delivery matters as well. If you mumble, avert eye contact, or stand in the corner with your arms crossed, it won’t matter what you say.
No matter how much damage was done, a sincere apology restores faith.
The Courage To Apologize
Saying you’re sorry is uncomfortable. It can be hard to admit your shortcomings and acknowledge your mistakes. But taking responsibility is the key to restoring trust.
3
Key Ideas
Causing unintentional harm
We all cause harm to our partner and the intimacy between us. We make mistakes that are foolish and unintentional and sometimes launch attacks on purpose.
When you wound another, apologi...
How to give an apology
A good apology takes two people: the giver and the receiver. An apology that heals is based on kindness, generosity, and compassion.
The recipient accepts it with grace and, in turn, offers forgiveness. Without forgiveness, it cannot heal.
The mindful apology in practice
- Repair: An apology that rebuilds intimacy should have three parts: you need to own the mistake, and then you need to repair the damage. Lastly, you need to vow to improve.
- Forgive: If you have been hurt, you may never completely forget, but you can choose to forgive. To decide to forgive means that you don't relive something that belongs to the past.
- Begin again: Unfinished business will accumulate. Let go of the small and the large wounds, so they don't pile up.
7
Key Ideas
The first draft
The first words you write are the first draft. Writing is thinking. You'll rarely know what exactly you want to say when you start writing.
The time you put into editing, reworking and re...
Common errors
Most writing mistakes are widespread, but good writers just get better at spotting them. Some things you'll learn to watch for are:
- Overuse of jargon and business-speak, like "utilize" or "endeavor" instead of "use" or "try."
- Clichés are stale phrases that have lost their impact and novelty through overuse. If you are used to seeing it in print, don't use it.
- The passive voice. The subject of the sentence should be the person or thing taking action, not the thing being acted on. "Harry wrote this article," is better than "This article was written by Harry."
- Rambling. When you are not sure what you want to say, it is easy to phrase it in three or four different ways. A single concise sentence is generally better.
Give it some space
When you write something, you get very close to it. It is nearly impossible to distance yourself from it straight away to edit properly.
The longer you can leave a draft before editing, the better. Half an hour to two days is enough of a break to edit well. When you do edit, read your work out loud. You'll catch more problems and get a better feel for how everything flows.