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How To Have Difficult Conversations At Work
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Key Ideas
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Be direct
When having a difficult conversation, be direct and get to the point quickly.
Difficult conversations become even more difficult when the delivery is complicated.
Most of the time, the person you're talking to knows that a critique is coming, so rather than dancing around the subject, just get to it.
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Be specific
The more clarity you can provide, the better the critique will be received during a difficult conversation.
Be honest and thorough with your feedback, and fully clarify why you're having the conversation. Offer as many concrete examples as possible so the person understands you're not just pulling things out of thin air.
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Plan out the conversation
The more prepared you are, the easier it will be to stay even tempered and not get flustered, and therefore deliver a more solid critique.
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Choose your words
Illustrating what a positive outcome looks like gives the employee something solid to work towards, and helps them understand why they’re being disciplined.
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Offer a solution
Clearly explain the reason for the conversation, the specific critique, and then offer suggestions to improve.
Even if the conversation is to fire an employee, you should still offer a suggestion that will help them improve in their next job.
Nothing is worse than delivering a critique and leaving it just at that.
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Manage your emotions
When emotions start to take over, remind yourself that the more in control you are of your emotions, the better you'll be able to deliver the message.
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Questions serve a double purpose
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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
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Key Ideas
Be Direct
During a difficult conversation, be quick and direct. This is not the time for feedback techniques, as they will mask the point of the conversation and lessen its impact making it more difficult.
Often, the person knows that a critique is coming, so rather than dancing around the subject, just get to it. It’s better for both parts.
Be Specific
Be honest and thorough with your feedback, give examples and fully clarify why you're having the conversation.
The more clarity you can provide, the better the critique will be received.
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Key Ideas
More Positive Than Negative Feedback
High-performing organizations deliver roughly five times as many positive statements (supportive, appreciative, encouraging) as negative ones (critical, disapproving, contradictory). That’s because...
Focus On The Positive Parts
We tend to focus on giving employees critical feedback. But, by focusing on their weaknesses, we only create competence. By focusing on their strengths, we create excellence.
Give equal measures of positive and negative feedback. We usually gloss over the strengths, but focus in great detail on the critical feedback. Add examples and details to your positive feedback.
Emphasize Collaboration
Be objective when you speak about a negative event. Rather than placing blame or evaluating the problematic situation, describe it and its consequences, and suggest acceptable alternatives.
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Key Ideas
Let People Talk First
Let others to talk about themselves first. Then, you’ll be able to sell yourself more naturally.
If they are interested in what you have to offer, you can naturally transition into a p...
Ask Good Questions That Show You’re Engaged
Ask at least one question before changing topic to show you’re engaged. Gathering details makes it more likely that you’ll be able to establish a connection with the other person or find a way you can lend a hand.
Prepare For A Conversation Without Being Creepy
Take a look at the person’s LinkedIn or Twitter account to get an idea of his tone, interests, etc. You’re always at an advantage when you know more about a person. It will be easier to relate to him and you might avoid awkward conversations.