The social biome: how to build nourishing friendships – and banish loneliness

An ever-extending network of relationships called the family, the community, the nation, the globe can bring extraordinary benefits if we let it.

Research shows that the best single predictor for your psychological and physical wellbeing and health is the number and quality of friendships you have.

Research found that people with a higher sense of well-being had more frequent and longer interactions.

• They had meaningful conversations two-and-a-half times more often than those with the least healthy social biomes.
• They had two-thirds of interactions with close friends and family, where those with the least healthy social biomes less than half.
• Most surprising, they felt good, connected, and happy to be alone.

• Small talk: Easy, quick and friendly small talk is good for mood regulation, such as asking a colleague about their weekend or chatting about the traffic with a waiter.
• Time alone: Healthy people don't function by having more frequent and longer conversations with their friends and family. Alone time is part of a healthy biome.

From the moment you don't see a friend with the frequency you used to, the friendship's quality starts to decline.

• Don't forget about Zoom. Continue to wave awkwardly on video calls when you can only communicate online.
• Invite people to things. Invite people you don't know well but would like to know better to coffee, a party, or a gallery.
• Climb the ladder of communication. The lowest rung is browsing social media, then direct messaging a group, then a direct message to people you want to keep in touch with, then phone calls and video chat, and the top rung is face-to-face conversation.