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The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz
This book can bring you to a place of personal power and get you out of reaction mode. Perspective can help to maintain balance.
The four agreements are:
- Be impeccable with your word
- Don't take anything personally
- Don't make assumptions
- Always do your best
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Be impeccable with your word
Words have power. They have the power to lift and the power to destroy.
When you are impeccable with your word, you:
- Speak with integrity
- Say what you mean
- Don't gossip
- Don't speak negatively of other people or about yourself.
This agreement will decrease negativity in your life. As a result, you will have less conflict with other people around you.
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Don't take anything personally
If you practice this agreement, you agree that other people have their own identity and their own reality that you don't have anything to do with.
When someone insults you or belittles your talent, remember it's not about you. It's about them. When you accept this, you recognise that the other person's opinions of you do not necessarily describe you. If you take things personally, it means you agree with what that person is saying about you. But you don't have to. You can choose not to let it affect you at all.
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Don't make assumptions
We often assume we know why someone does something. This creates misunderstandings between people and unnecessary drama in our relationships.
We can't read minds. We have no idea what's going on in someone else's head.
- Be aware and mindful of when you make an assumption.
- Instead of making an assumption, ask.
- When you are wondering about something someone did or said, seek the truth.
- Practice healthy communication.
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Always do your best
Let go of past mistakes and judgments and focus on new habits.
Learn to say no to those things you don't want to do and yes to the tasks that fill your life with gratitude, joy, and value.
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