How To Build The Self-Confidence You Need To Win At Life - Darius Foroux
Bernice Milburn Moore
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You become more self-confident if you become better at what you do.
The process goes like this:
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Remind yourself how awesome you are with affirmations. Write down affirmations that remind you of your capabilities and strengths and keep them somewhere you can find them if nerves strike.
Another suggestion is to keep a file of praise, awards, and other evidence of how good you are at your job an read them when you are struggling with a confidence crisis.
Take a moment to really analyze what you’re feeling and strategize for that.
Can you reframe negative feelings, like fear, into something more positive, like anticipation? If not, remind yourself that it’s perfectly normal to be nervous before a high-stakes situation.
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That reticence to ever ask someone out on a date probably plays out in your failure to move to a new city, to take that new job or the timidity around your co-workers.
People don’t like it when someone changes or does something that makes them feel awkward or insecure. They will think he’s crazy, selfish, arrogant. If you want to do something incredible, you have to become comfortable with being different from the rest.
As cliche as that sounds. Most of us give up on something we’re passionate about too soon. But anyone who’s been successful has a tale of struggle and perseverance to share.
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When you think you have to sacrifice something in your life in order to be successful you will build frustration and resentment towards yourself. And so that lofty goal that should ha...
From comparing our lives to others. Why do you think you look at things as a sacrifice? Compared to what? “Well, so and so is having an avocado salad at a rooftop bar in SoHo.” Who gives a shit. ⚠️
Excuses are rationalizations we make to ourselves about people, events, and circumstances.
They are invented reasons we create to defend our behavior, to postpone taking action or simpl...
We make excuses for the following key reasons:
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It is a psychological phenomenon that reflects the belief that you’re an inadequate and incompetent failure despite evidence that indicates you’re skilled and quite successful.
They set the bar excessively high for themselves and when they fail to reach their goals, they experience major self-doubt. For this type, success is rarely satisfying because they believe they could’ve done even better.
But that’s not productive. Learning to celebrate achievements is essential if you want to avoid burnout and find contentment.
Impostor workaholics are actually addicted to the validation that comes from working, not to the work itself. They push themselves to work harder, to measure up with their colleagues.
Start drifting away from external validation. No one should have more power to make you feel good about yourself than you.
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Self-esteem was a measurement of ...
The theory is that if everyone has high self-esteem, then everyone will be successful and live a happy life. If a society was inoculated with high self-esteem, it would end poverty, crime, and violence.
But, one should take into account that high self-esteem could be the result of success, not necessarily the cause. Also, thinking that only one thing can explain how to be successful, is probably naive.
There’s actually very little correlation between self-esteem and success. Research on self-esteem strongly correlates with how good people feel, in general.
Self-esteem is complex and can be a good or a bad thing, depending on what is measured.
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That means if someone close to you asks, “How are things?” You respond with, “I feel like dog shit,” not with, “Oh, I’m greeeeeeat,” and then run away to cry into your cereal bowl and wonder why nobody in the world cares about you. - Mark Manson
... and boils down to what we give up to attain something. Our mindsets are inclined towards pleasure and resistive towards pain. We normally like to think in terms of gai...
Decisions are a cost-benefit analysis of risking something small for the opportunity to gain something big.
Trade-offs are not something as simple as flipping a coin. Our values guide us towards what we want in life, and it is not the same for all. Example: Buying a house has a trade-off of mortgage for the next ten or more years. This is subjective and depends on what we value in life.
Indecisive people suffer because they don’t know their inner values and what they care about.
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Meditation significantly lowers depression, stress, and anxiety – the key reasons for a restless mind.
Elimination of these factors greatly helps in improving concentration, thus increa...
Puzzle games and crosswords are both good mind stimulators and can improve your brain power, confidence, and self-esteem.
Their inherent attractiveness lies in the fact they are challenging. Solving puzzles makes your brain work continuously, thus making you push the limits of your intellect.
A hobby that you can pursue in a relaxed and non-competitive environment opens up the creative windows of your mind.
Try something like embroidery instead of the usual paintings and water-color drawings.
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