Pleasanteeism is a new word for the behavior of putting on a people-pleasing facade in the workplace. It usually happens because one feels pressured to present as the most positive, least demanding version of yourself.
MORE IDEAS FROM The 'Pleasanteeism' Trap: 5 Ways To Be More Assertive At Work
When we say the word assertive the first word that pops up in our head is "confrontational" and for whatever reason it just feels like "rudeness" in a way should we ever try to make ourselves assertive.
However, assertiveness in the workplace only means that you're able to speak up for yourself in a respectful and appropriate manner for the workplace. It's being confident in your communicating skills and abilities without being brash.
How you deliver your sentence matters. When we communicate in a positive and constructive way, we are showing that we are helpful and empathetic of the situation.
We should be wary of our body language like our eye contact, not to strong to seem like you're challenging the others but also not to soft where you'll seem like you're pleading.
Remember to speak clearly and calmly, and that your words should be articulated so that there is no misunderstanding.
If you're a people-pleaser, it will affect several areas of our lives and we'll always put the needs of others instead of our own.
With being assertive, our aim is to be supportive and helpful while also being realistic of how much we can put on our plate. By understanding our capabilities and capacity, we are able to bring the maximum value to the team and to the organization.
Who is your role model?
Have you ever thought of who inspires you do become a better version of yourself?
If you want to be more assertive, find someone you admire who's assertive. Try to strike up a conversation with them and ask them how they do it.
By doing so, you'll be able to find a way to be assertive that works best for you in an authentic way that's befitting to your personality.
Being assertive doesn't mean that you're looking for a fight but rather you'll be negotiating your stance for the benefit of everyone.
You can be assertive while still being polite and humble as long as you focus on the value of which you want to bring to the company.
A work-life balance is important and to achieve that is to be assertive that you can do this much of work until that work is done, they shouldn't unload more projects on your plate more than you can carry.
When we talk to our supervisors about our priorities and the goals that we want to achieve it shows them that we are a team player and that we would like to contribute to the company a more valuable employee.
Assertiveness is behaving in one's own best interests, standing up for oneself without being anxious or guilty, expressing one's honest feelings comfortably, and exercising one's right without denying others theirs.
Practice assertiveness by being firm and demanding yet soft, direct and respectful.
It empowers you to draw necessary boundaries with people that will allow you to get your needs met in relationships without alienating others and without letting resentment and anger creep in.
Many people mistake assertiveness for aggressiveness, but assertiveness is actually the balanced middle ground between aggressiveness and passivity.
A Google search of ‘How to be more assertive’ returns more than 22 million results. Women have more trouble with assertiveness than men do.
A study by the Gender Action Portal at Harvard University found that, in salary negotiations, women concede earlier than men, anticipate greater backlash, and are discouraged by others’ perceptions of assertiveness as a non-feminine trait.
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