Learn more about communication with this collection
Understanding the concept of the self
The importance of living in the present moment
The illusion of control
Being factual about what you don't like in someone's behavior (without overdramatizing) is an important start.
The same should be done in describing the effects of their behavior. Don’t exaggerate, label or judge; just describe.
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A sentence starting with “You...” comes off as more of a judgment or an attack and puts people on the defensive.
If you start with “I,” the focus is more on how you are feeling and how you are affected by their behavior. Also, it shows more ownership of your reactions and less blame....
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It empowers you to draw necessary boundaries with people that will allow you to get your needs met in relationships without alienating others and without letting resentment and anger creep in.
Many people mistake assertiveness for aggressiveness, but assertiveness is actually ...
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A great formula that puts it all together: “When you [their behavior], I feel [your feelings].”
When used with factual statements, rather than judgments or labels, this formula provides a direct, non-attacking, more responsible way of letting people know how their behavior affects yo...
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Include the results of their behavior, in factual terms:
“When you [their behavior], then [results of their behavior], and I feel [how you feel].”
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... especially when it comes to things you don't like.
When approaching someone about the behavior you’d like to see changed, stick to factual descriptions of what they’ve done that has upset you, rather than using negative labels or words that convey judgment.
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Other curated ideas on this topic:
... especially when it comes to things you don't like.
When approaching someone about the behavior you’d like to see changed, stick to factual descriptions of what they’ve done that has upset you, rather than using negative labels or words that convey judgment.
The minute we judge them as good, as being desirable and key phases to growth, we’re liable to sit and stew in them for too long. The minute we judge them as bad and start suppressing and repressing them, we’re liable to miss out on what these phases have to teach us, an...
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