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It empowers you to draw necessary boundaries with people that will allow you to get your needs met in relationships without alienating others and without letting resentment and anger creep in.
Many people mistake assertiveness for aggressiveness, but assertiveness is actually the balanced middle ground between aggressiveness and passivity.
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... especially when it comes to things you don't like.
When approaching someone about the behavior you’d like to see changed, stick to factual descriptions of what they’ve done that has upset you, rather than using negative labels or words that convey judgment.
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Being factual about what you don't like in someone's behavior (without overdramatizing) is an important start.
The same should be done in describing the effects of their behavior. Don’t exaggerate, label or judge; just describe.
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A sentence starting with “You...” comes off as more of a judgment or an attack and puts people on the defensive.
If you start with “I,” the focus is more on how you are feeling and how you are affected by their behavior. Also, it shows more ownership of your reactions and less blame.
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A great formula that puts it all together: “When you [their behavior], I feel [your feelings].”
When used with factual statements, rather than judgments or labels, this formula provides a direct, non-attacking, more responsible way of letting people know how their behavior affects you.
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Include the results of their behavior, in factual terms:
“When you [their behavior], then [results of their behavior], and I feel [how you feel].”
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Passive communicators battle to express their needs and stand by their convictions. This is because they want to avoid conflict. They may be silent during crucial meetings. If they do make a suggestion and it is challenged, they may say, "never mind then."
Aggressive Communicators voice their opinions in a straightforward, often blunt way. They often interrupt others, take up significantly more time than others during meetings and don't take into account others' feelings or opinions.
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... is imperative for every successful business. Poor communication inevitably causes misunderstandings, confusion and conflicts that hinder productivity and professi...
It helps to prevent misunderstandings and conflicts. It can help to defuse a potentially explosive dispute while bad communication can set it off.
Avoiding Difficult Conversations.
Reacting, Not Responding.
Not Keeping an Open Mind. Accept and respect differences, listen without judgment and consider all sides of an issue.
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Assertiveness is behaving in one's own best interests, standing up for oneself without being anxious or guilty, expressing one's honest feelings comfortably, and exercising one's right without deny...
Most people are either passive or aggressive. Passive people are afraid of confrontation and lie easily.
Aggressive people are not liked, as they can trample others for their own benefit.
The middle ground, assertiveness, is where you want to be: Respectful, firm, observant, and detached.