4 Types of Difficult People and How to Deal With Them | Science of People
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Don't try changing people, try understanding them.
When you try to change someone they tend to resent you, dig in their heels, and get worse. The way to disengage a difficult person is to try understanding where they are coming from.
When trying to understand difficult people, search for their value language.
A value language is what someone values most. It is what drives their decisions. For some people it is money; for others, it is power or knowledge.
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Accept them exactly as they are.
Accept that they are unable to change, at least at this point in time. Unless you see real change — proof that this person is making an effort&nb...
Try to avoid getting into a fight-or-flight response, which inevitably leads to becoming defensive.
Let them fully state their point of view about the issue/conflict/problem without interruption. What do they feel people misunderstand about them? What do they want or expect from others?
The idea is to remain as neutral as possible. Just listening may be enough to allow someone to feel like they have the opportunity to say what’s on their mind.
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Major changes can create a sense of loneliness, even if they're positive. You might be leaving a job or starting a new job, ending a relationship or embarking on a new relationship, getting married, getting divorced, [or] starting a family.
When struggling with the adjustment period, it can help to acknowledge the feeling and also acknowledge that it's likely temporary.
There's very specific loneliness that can creep in when you're responsible for the care of another person — be it an elderly parent, a sick sibling, a disabled partner, etc.
So even though it's a big job, it's important to not forget about yourself. Find a supportive friend to talk to without judgment, or attend a support group.
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We are social creatures who desire validation. We feel good when others share our belief system. But we feel dejected when others do not value our inputs, crush our ideas, or ignore what we have to...
We view the world and the people in it from a specific paradigm.
How we relate to someone is driven by our personality, expectations, background, and experience. Why we find someone difficult is then a very personal affair.
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