Likeability and Being Perfect - Deepstash
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How to Be More Mindful

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Likeability and Being Perfect

Personality and positive qualities like honesty, compassion, humor, etc. , aren't what perfectionists believe people will like about them.

It's not enough to be a wonderful person, you must be a perfectly wonderful person. You don't allow others to see your flaws and most likely you talk about your achievements, but never your failures.

323

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Pretending Everything Is Perfect

Perfectionists are afraid of judgment. They often want to be seen as being effortlessly perfect.

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Pursuing Perfection, But Never Feeling Perfect

Even if you have a clear goal of what perfection means, obsessively pursuing it is a sign of insecurity.

And insecurity, when not addressed directly, doesn’t go away because a concrete objective has been achieved, it manifests itself into self-criticism or a new overvalue...

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Not Allowing Yourself To Fail

Instead of forgiving and viewing mistakes as a learning opportunity, you criticize and put pressure on yourself for not predicting a less than perfect outcome. You feel inadequate, and these feelings preoccupy your mind, often to the point of losing productivity.

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Life Doesn't Satisfy You

Perfectionists cope well in a low-stress environment. Outside of that, anxiety often increases, which offers the illusion that nothing is going well, thereby decreasing life satisfaction.

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Avoiding Challenges That May Lead To Failure

When presented with an opportunity that requires new skills or moving outside of your comfort zone, you're likely to turn it down. You're afraid to not be good enough to tackle a new learning curve and to be seen as a failure or a disappointment.

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Not Celebrating Your Success

It's never good enough, so you get sucked so far into the details that you become frustrated.

Even when your goal is complete and results in success, you believe you could and should have done it better.

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Struggling With Getting Things Done

You may get things done, but you are in a constant battle with the decisions and motivation to complete certain things. The "what ifs" and expectation of a negative consequence or result preoccupies you and the pressure can be overwhelming.

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Sometimes, all you need to do is look at things from a different perspective.

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5. Talk in terms of the other person's interests

5. Talk in terms of the other person's interests

It means finding common ground with the person you're talking to and showing that you understand their point of view. When you talk about things that the other person is interested in, they're more likely to be engaged in the conversation and to feel like you're on their side.

Open Up and Show Yourself

Showing your vulnerability, sincerity, and honesty isn’t comfortable, but is a sign of courage. Truthful and sincere people shine like the sun and can be spotted easily in this noisy world.

Being able to talk about failure and your weaknesses makes you human and also inspires the people ar...

Feel and express your emotions

Until we fully release our emotions, they continue to affect our present mindset.

  • Do anger work.Β Allow yourself to be fully disappointed, sad or depressed. Talk about it.
  • Write a letter. Purging emotions out on paper give them a place to live outside of yourself.

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