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Know your brain

Know your brain

Our response to difficult conversations is neurologically the same response to fear: the fight, flight, or freeze response.

When you feel that internal escalation, think, “Oh this is really interesting, what’s happening is my reptilian brain is taking over. Just that awareness itself can be helpful.

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One of the traps of digging into hard conversations is a desire to get to a copacetic place where everyone feels better. 

To avoid miscommunication, repeat or summarize their words back to them in a form like, “What I’m hearing you say is…” It creates a feedback loop that allows someone to course correct or dial it back.

A mediation mindset is a place for trying to get to the root of an issue. That might mean proceeding without an agenda and just trying to learn more. 

Good communication is a full-body experience. It’s how we breathe. It’s our tone. It’s our gestures. 

When we are in conflict, our view of the other person becomes so narrow that we do not see them as a fleshed-out person.

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