Ask for specific examples and clarification - Deepstash

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Ask for specific examples and clarification

If you get nonspecific, not clear feedback like, “you’re not being proactive enough” you’re going to need to dig a bit.

  • Make a request such as, “can you share with me a specific example of when you think I could have been more proactive?”
  • Or you can even say, “I want to make sure we’re using the same language. What behaviors do you associate with being proactive?”

Remember – tone matters a lot. Speak calmly, carefully, and with curiosity.

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MORE IDEAS FROM THE SAME ARTICLE

Ask yourself this: “If I had to admit that 2% of the feedback were true, what 2% would it be?”. This gives you the opportunity to reflect on the overall feedback, and look for parts of it where maybe (just maybe) you can see yourself in there.

Here's what NOT to do if you get some feedback from your manager that you disagree with:

As much as you may find little merit in your manager’s feedback, look for any areas of agreement—no matter how small.

 If, after your conversation, your manager backs down because you helped them see it your way, congratulations. And, in the likely event that this doesn’t happen, make a plan with your manager for you to try the new or different approach—but to check back in soon about how it’s going.

If you’re finding yourself experiencing some challenging emotions that feel hard to manage, or if you notice that you’re having a tough time processing and responding, slow the process down.

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