Focus on Others

The environment has a large effect on personality and mental health. However, genetics may drive us to extract aspects of the environment that match our actual predispositions.

Genes and the environment work together as a dynamic system. Because of that, you can always change it through psychological therapies that can teach you techniques to cope.

Shyness in itself is quite common and normal, but it can become a problem if it develops into social anxiety where you avoid things that need to be done. You might not be able to talk to people at work or have difficulties socializing.

• Job interviews. Going on a job interview may be challenging. Proper preparation with mock interviews and engaging in deep breathing practices may help to calm yourself.
• Job duties that include presentations or cold calling clients can be managed with social skills training, reading self-help books, or groups such as Toastmasters.

The inability to network and build work relationships will make it more difficult to advance at work.

To become more comfortable with coworkers, continually try to expand your comfort zone. Engage in small talk with people you see during the day in the lunchroom, the elevator, or at the water cooler. Greet people with general comments or compliments. Start short conversations. It's less important to say the right thing and more important to show up and be present.

When we get rejected, our brains register an emotional chemical response so strong, it can physically hurt. 

We go through almost the same stages as if we were grieving (self-blame, trying to win back our rejecter because we hate being disliked, and feeling like a failure). These feelings are healthy and normal, so long as you don’t end up dwelling on them.

Rejection is personal, and it’s easy to start questioning your self-worth when someone makes it clear they don’t like you. 

But for the most part, being disliked is a matter of mutual compatibility. Keep in mind that likability has a lot to do with what you bring to someone else’s table, whether or not you realize it.