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The biggest barrier shy people have to overcome is that they have this tremendous sense of self-focus. Popular people focus on others instead of obsessing about themselves.
Popular people are genuinely interested in other people, actively learn more about them, and look for connections.
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Popular people have worked at and mastered this.
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Popular people take charge of making dates and sending out invitations. These interactions allow them to continue to work on their social skills. Shy people wait to be asked out.
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Popular people are aware of what’s going on around them and appear approachable. They’re interested in others and are good listeners. They also introduce people to each other by sharing details that generate conversations.
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Popular people are often kind people. The notice you and might pay you a compliment. They'll ask if you need anything and help you.
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If the idea of mingling at a party or giving a presentation in front of people make you feel sick, you are not alone.
About 30% of shyness is because of genetics. The rest comes abo...
The environment has a large effect on personality and mental health. However, genetics may drive us to extract aspects of the environment that match our actual predispositions.
Genes and the environment work together as a dynamic system. Because of that, you can always change it through psychological therapies that can teach you techniques to cope.
Shyness in itself is quite common and normal, but it can become a problem if it develops into social anxiety where you avoid things that need to be done. You might not be able to talk to people at work or have difficulties socializing.
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It's impossible to please everyone. And rejection is a way to figure out who’s compatible with whom: getting axed from a social group gives you space to find folks that are a little ...
When we get rejected, our brains register an emotional chemical response so strong, it can physically hurt.
We go through almost the same stages as if we were grieving (self-blame, trying to win back our rejecter because we hate being disliked, and feeling like a failure). These feelings are healthy and normal, so long as you don’t end up dwelling on them.
Rejection is personal, and it’s easy to start questioning your self-worth when someone makes it clear they don’t like you.
But for the most part, being disliked is a matter of mutual compatibility. Keep in mind that likability has a lot to do with what you bring to someone else’s table, whether or not you realize it.
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Introverts tend to be reflective and have close relationships.
But it can be hard to be open and let strangers into your life. Small talk doesn’t come easy, and it’s hard work to estab...