deepstash

Beta

If Self-Discipline Feels Difficult, Then You're Doing It Wrong

Benefits of Self Acceptance

When you stop feeling bad about yourself:

  • There’s no need to indulge yourself anymore, as you are not hiding from yourself any longer.
  • You see no reason to punish yourself with guilt. You start to like yourself, so you want to take care of yourself.
  • You feel an urge to take care of yourself not out of will-power but out of self-love.
  • You feel good about your self-care, making the self-discipline routine last longer and having more impact.

732 SAVES


This is a professional note extracted from an online article.

Read more efficiently

Save what inspires you

Remember anything

IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

If Self-Discipline Feels Difficult, Then You're Doing It Wrong

If Self-Discipline Feels Difficult, Then You're Doing It Wrong

https://markmanson.net/self-discipline

markmanson.net

6

Key Ideas

The Uberman Sleep Schedule

  • According to the Uberman research, Sleep follows the 80/20 Rule—that is, 80% of your recovery comes from 20% of the time you’re asleep.
  • The Uberman Sleep Schedule:  if you took 20-minute naps, every four hours, around the clock, you would “train” your brain to fall into REM sleep instantly the moment you tried to rest.
  • Sleep Deprivation is extremely dangerous for the mind and body.

About willpower

  • Most people think of self-discipline in terms of willpower only, which is wrong.
  • Individuals who are able to follow the set rules of self-discipline also tend to be the ones who enjoy the routine.
  • To succeed in your self-discipline routine, your willpower must be trained steadily over a long period of time.

Natural instincts

  • Disciplining people through shame and guilt works well in society, and natural impulses/ instincts being suppressed by religion and philosophers.
  • The curbing of our natural instincts is a method employed to protect us from our over-indulgence and from our own natural desires.

Self Discipline through Self Acceptance

  • De-link your personal failings from moral failings. You have to accept that you like to indulge occasionally and that this doesn’t necessarily make you a bad person. 
  • Accept your shortcomings, leading yourself to eventually accept yourself as you are, without guilt or shame.
  • De-couple your emotions from your moral judgments.

Benefits of Self Acceptance

When you stop feeling bad about yourself:

  • There’s no need to indulge yourself anymore, as you are not hiding from yourself any longer.
  • You see no reason to punish yourself with guilt. You start to like yourself, so you want to take care of yourself.
  • You feel an urge to take care of yourself not out of will-power but out of self-love.
  • You feel good about your self-care, making the self-discipline routine last longer and having more impact.

Self-discipline without Willpower

Once you resolve much of your shame, and once you’ve created situations to provide greater emotional benefits from doing the desired behavior than not doing it, you start to experience discipline without willpower.

You wake up early because it feels good to wake up early. You eat healthy because you feel good about not eating junk and having the right diet. The pain is still there, but you work with the pain rather than against it. You pursue it rather than run from it.

EXPLORE MORE AROUND THESE TOPICS:

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

The reasons we crave junk food
  1. The sensation of eating the food: what it tastes like, what it smells like and how it feels in your mouth.
  2. The blend of proteins, fats, and carbohydrates t...
How craving are stimulated artificially
  • Salivary response: the more a food causes you to salivate, the more it will cover your taste buds.
  • Rapid food meltdown: this tells your brain that you’re not full, even though you’re eating a lot of calories.
  • Calorie density. junk foods are designed to convince your brain that it is getting nutrition, but to not fill you up.
  • Memories of past eating experiences: When you eat something tasty, your brain registers that feeling and will bring it up in the future.
Building better habits means changing your environment

Most people think that building better habits or changing your actions is all about willpower or motivation. But your environment has an incredible ability to shape your behavior.

Nowhere is this more true than with food.

4 more ideas

Our emotions are short-term biased

Our emotions are obsessed with the present moment because it’s difficult to look past our immediate fears and anxieties. And this prevents good decision-making.

The sweet spot in de...

“Risky” behavior you should consider
  • Propose “moonshot” ideas, knowing that 90% of them will get shot down, but that if one of them gets accepted, it will be a huge boost to your career.
  • Be excessively bold in your dating life, stating exactly who and what you want.
  • Buy difficult books expecting that most of them won’t be useful to you, but also that, occasionally, one will completely change your life.
  • Say yes to every invitation knowing that most of the events/people will be boring, but that occasionally you’ll meet someone really interesting.
Optimizing life for fewer regrets

Most of us are afraid of messing thing up. But we rarely ask, “Would I regret that failure?” If the answer is “no,” then that is absolutely a risk you should pursue.

Sometimes, the right decision becomes crystal clear when put into these terms.

one more idea

The secret to self-discipline

The elegant secret to discipline: valuing your future self as highly as you value your current self, at least long enough to get your Right Now Self to do the right thing.

The choices of your Past Selves

You are currently experiencing the future of all your Past Selves. Their choices have come to fruition.

If you would like better fruits, make your Right Now Self into someone who, as a habit, rolls out the red carpet for Future Self.

Catch yourself cheating

Recognize the moments when you’re about to sell out your Future Self: They often happen when you are in retail establishments and involve televisions or other gratifying electronic devices, high-fructose corn syrup and disposable packaging.