Remove Buzzwords from Your Copy

Example:

• Dear Friend - 10% response rate
• Dear Accountant - 12% response rate
• Dear “Frustrated” Accountant - 50% response rate.

Connect with them on the first line and they stay hooked.

General: UK men love cold coffee.

Specific: Recent survey showed that 70% of UK men over 25 drink cold coffee 6 days a week.

No one thing applies to everyone in a group. Do more research.

Boring: 80% of women have read the book “How to say fuck you”

Storytelling: “Imagine you get on a 10-seater bus to work and all 8 women seated are reading ‘How to say fuck you…’

The second sentence allows prospects to paint the picture in their heads....

No Data: This gel grows your hair significantly.

With Data: This gel grows your 4B hair by 1-inch every week.

You become more specific…

And your target audience know what they’re getting.

Subjective: I think our weight loss drink works better than others on the market.

Objective: 8 out of 10 women who drink our weight loss tea have lost 60 pounds in 4 weeks.

Subjective writing lacks confidence.

Replace it with objective writing.

Remove friction words like Sign up. Buy. Submit. Invest.

They make your readers feel like they need to do more work.

Instead, tell them what they’ll get.

Example:

With Friction Word: Submit your email

With Benefit: Receive my free letters.

• As you already know, every man over 30 has...
• You are well aware that the skin...

Both the statements assume the readers know something.

If you're going to tell your readers something...

Do that without assuming they already know.

Wrong: It takes a short time to recharge the batteries.

Right: Full recharge in 30 minutes.

Nobody wants to struggle to understand what your words mean. Be clear.