The Dark Side Of Grit

When to endure

Do not endure from a place of suffering. Toxicity is never yours to carry.

Endure from a place of strength and power. Endure from a place of love, and desire, and attraction.


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The Dark Side Of Grit

The Dark Side Of Grit


Key Ideas

Grit and success

Grit is the ability to continue despite setbacks. It is about facing difficulties and navigating obstacles. It's taking ownership.

The problem is that we can push ourselves too far and allow toxicity to build.

Enduring when we shouldn't

When we endure more than we have to, we can become blind to the fact that it does not have to be that difficult. We just keep going.

There is pride in grit. But there is no pride in enduring for the sake of enduring.

When to endure

Do not endure from a place of suffering. Toxicity is never yours to carry.

Endure from a place of strength and power. Endure from a place of love, and desire, and attraction.



Destiny Beliefs

They are inflexible perspectives that assume that when people who are “meant to be” start a relationship, they will live happily ever after without encountering doubts or difficulties.

Growth Beliefs

They assume that couples need to make an effort to overcome challenges in order to be successful and that happy relationships are the gradual result of teamwork.

Studies suggest that people who hold growth beliefs demonstrate a greater level of commitment to their relationship, and are more optimistic when it comes to repairing damage following an argument.

Reading Each Other’s Minds

It isn’t reasonable to expect your partner to be a mind-reader, even if they have known you for a long time. Besides, it makes the other feel uncertain and needlessly prolongs and increases the conflict.

Healthy communication does still entail making your needs and preferences explicit.

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Invented back in the 19th century, bicycles were as disruptive as the iPhone was when it was launched in 2007.

A bicycle was unbelievably cool, took one anywhere for free quickly and didn’t...

The Invention of The Bicycle

John Kemp Starley invented the bicycle as we know it today when he was only 30. His ‘Rover Safety’ bicycle, first displayed in a bicycle show in 1886, was a curiosity, but later when pneumatic tires were added to it to cushion the ride, it became safer, smoother and also 30 per cent faster.

Women Power and Bicycles

The masses, especially women, suddenly experienced freedom to go anywhere without the need for expensive carriages and horses.

The bicycles transformed society, and emancipated women in a way nothing else could. Women found them lightweight, fast, affordable and easy to take care of.

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Diffusing difficult situations
Diffusing difficult situations
  • Avoiding challenging conversations allows room for assumptions and continuing negative behavior.
  • Meet with the person to understand their concerns.
  • Listen
Your attitude is crucial
Regardless of whether you are right or wrong, your attitude will determine the outcome of any contentious experience. It’s incredibly important to have a peaceful state of mind before entering into a potential conflict situation.
Choose your words wisely
  • Stay away from starting sentences with “you." 
  • Hear the other person out first. Don’t apologize, but acknowledge that there is a problem. 
  • Ask questions for clarity, and be sure that you understand all the facts before you proceed with a resolution. 
  • If you need to clear the  a false accusation, do so concisely. You can say, “I would like to present information that may clear up this matter.”