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The Dark Side Of Grit

The Dark Side Of Grit
My first motorcycle was a 1982 Yamaha. It had a leaky head gasket, broken fuel gage, unstable forks, a front brake that was so weak it was effectively nonexistent, a rear brake that had such a poor assembly I had to push the pedal all the way back in order to engage it, and the bike stalled most every time I rode in the rain (which was often.)


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Grit and success

Grit is the ability to continue despite setbacks. It is about facing difficulties and navigating obstacles. It's taking ownership.

The problem is that we can push ourselves too far and allow toxicity to build.



Enduring when we shouldn't

When we endure more than we have to, we can become blind to the fact that it does not have to be that difficult. We just keep going.

There is pride in grit. But there is no pride in enduring for the sake of enduring.


When to endure

Do not endure from a place of suffering. Toxicity is never yours to carry.

Endure from a place of strength and power. Endure from a place of love, and desire, and attraction.





Invented back in the 19th century, bicycles were as disruptive as the iPhone was when it was launched in 2007.

A bicycle was unbelievably cool, took one anywhere for free quickly and didn’t...

The Invention of The Bicycle

John Kemp Starley invented the bicycle as we know it today when he was only 30. His ‘Rover Safety’ bicycle, first displayed in a bicycle show in 1886, was a curiosity, but later when pneumatic tires were added to it to cushion the ride, it became safer, smoother and also 30 per cent faster.

Women Power and Bicycles

The masses, especially women, suddenly experienced freedom to go anywhere without the need for expensive carriages and horses.

The bicycles transformed society, and emancipated women in a way nothing else could. Women found them lightweight, fast, affordable and easy to take care of.

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Destiny Beliefs

They are inflexible perspectives that assume that when people who are “meant to be” start a relationship, they will live happily ever after without encountering doubts or difficulties.

Growth Beliefs

They assume that couples need to make an effort to overcome challenges in order to be successful and that happy relationships are the gradual result of teamwork.

Studies suggest that people who hold growth beliefs demonstrate a greater level of commitment to their relationship, and are more optimistic when it comes to repairing damage following an argument.

Reading Each Other’s Minds

It isn’t reasonable to expect your partner to be a mind-reader, even if they have known you for a long time. Besides, it makes the other feel uncertain and needlessly prolongs and increases the conflict.

Healthy communication does still entail making your needs and preferences explicit.

The "chubby kid"

From young, many chubby kids get the message early on that they're fat.
The message gets spread through concerned adults when they ask the child to wear something a bit more flattering, while t...

A transformation

A strict diet and determination can transform the body into a thinner self. However, the mind struggles to follow the transformation. The perfect weight becomes the measurement for success, and any deviation from it feels like failure.


Beauty is not restricted to certain types of women at all. You don't need to be thin to find love.

Women should not feel that their bodies are tied to the perfect body of other women.