Try inviting your sad and negative self to find out why you feel this way. You won’t know what you truly want until you listen patiently to yourself. If you give it time, you'll find out what you really long for.
Sometimes, it is something about the way you've structured your days that doesn't honor the potential and countless possibilities that are stretched out before you. Or something about your anxiety has caused you to build things that restrict you. Your fears will keep you inside predictable shapes.