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Harvard researchers have mapped the five child-rearing techniques you need to raise kind kids
Instilling kindness
Most parents believe it is a top priority to instill kindness in their children.
However, in one study, nearly 80% of children surveyed said their parents taught them that personal happiness and high achievement were more important than caring for other people.
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Give kids opportunities for kindness
Children learn to act kindly the same way they learn anything else - with practice.
Give them daily opportunities to practice kindness, such as helping another child.
Two important skills
Children need to learn to focus on individuals and truly listen to them.
They also need to learn to see the bigger picture by putting human experience in context.
Role models
Children will emulate their parents. Children need to see how their parents show empathy, concern, and sympathy.
Managing destructive feelings
Shame, anger, and jealousy can interfere with kindness. Children need to be taught how to address these feelings.
When adults introduce ethical questions, they put issues of injustice in view and help children learn how to treat their various responsibilities to others and themselves.
Adults should stop passing the buck
Few parents are willing to admit that they might be part of the children's moral state.
Parents need to understand what values they are instilling in their children by being aware of their own actions.
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The Kids Are All Right
Due to the lockdown, most day-care centres, workplaces and schools are now closed. This has parents grappling with kids using technology at home, consuming media all day.
A few tips that can...
Don't Hand Over The Remote
Don’t just hand over the remote to the kids. Help them choose the right content that is educational, informative, and interesting enough for them to engage in for hours. There are various learning apps that can help them learn subjects, like Sesame Street, Bedtime Math and many others. Resources like Common Sense Media have plenty of content and activities related to healthy living, eating, and scientific fun facts. It helps to gauge your kids interest first and then choose the right media.
Participate With The Kids
While they are engaged in the media, stay with your kids(as much as possible), guide them, help them understand and form connections. Kids would have plenty of questions and providing them timely answers with examples makes the whole exercise fruitful and strengthens your bond with them.
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Self-compassion
Self-compassion is treating yourself with the same kindness and consideration that you would offer to someone else.
Self-compassion helps you cope with tough situations and helps you t...
Why parents need self-compassion
Parents' frame of mind impacts their children. Parents should not blame themselves when their children struggle.
Since parents lead by example, treating themselves with compassion and without judgment can help their children to do the same.
Make time for mindfulness
Many parents stop meditating once they have children. But new research suggests that even brief interventions can be helpful.
- Take two breaths of kindness wherever you are.
- Find moments of newness while engaged in your daily tasks of living.
- Bring awareness and gratitude to the everyday things you take for granted.
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Taking cues from you
When children witness a parent in a state of anxiety, they can become unsettled, because they take information about how to interpret situations from the parent.
If you notice your child sho...
Learn stress management techniques
A big part of treatment for children with anxiety is to teach parents stress tolerance.
A mental health professional can help you work through methods of stress management for your specific needs.
Model stress tolerance
You might learn strategies in therapy that you can impart to your child when she is feeling anxious.
Try to maintain a calm, neutral demeanor in front of your child, even if you are still trying to manage your anxiety. Children are quick to read facial expressions.
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