Admitting Failure - Deepstash

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This is how to not fail at failing

Admitting Failure

Humans tend to blame mistakes on external events, circumstances and people. Admitting failure goes against our ego, as we think it exposes our incompetence, leading to potential loss of respect and self-esteem. 

This makes us fear failure and highlights our tendency to attribute success to our efforts, and failure to circumstances.

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Excuses

People use excuses to rationalize their actions regarding their circumstances, their actions toward other people, and regarding certain events. It is also one of the primary reasons why people are unable to accomplish what they want out of life.

Stop comparing

When you are comparing yourself to others, you are probably only seeing part of the whole picture.

If you are making an excuse not to try something new, because you are comparing yourself to others who are experts in the field, remember that they were also inexperienced at some stage.

Stop fearing the unknown

The unknown can be scary, but it may not be a negative thing. Many good things can come from taking a step into the unknown.

The circular path
The circular path

... when you're trying to improve something look like this:

  • You start with some ideas.
  • You get excited for a while (1-2 weeks).
  • Maybe you take some steps and do something to act on your ideas.
  • Your enthusiasm starts to fade and your projects get abandoned.
  • You go back to where you started.
The staircase path

... when you're trying to improve something looks like this:

  • You get an idea.
  • You build a specific project around it (short-term).
  • Once you finish it, you move to the next idea and the project around it
  • Each project builds on the last, expanding options.
What defines the shape of your path
  • Focusing on one thing at a time until you finish it: if you focus on one project at a time until completion, you will make infinitely more progress than the person who does multiple projects at once.
  • Having the right method: doing something that’s outside your usual routine requires not just commitment, but new methods.
  • Actualization vs. possibility: the more you can adjust your life to the joys of doing and actualizing, over daydreaming and philosophizing, the more solid your life’s foundation will become.
The fear of regret

Being afraid of regret is a powerful driver of maintaining the status quo in our lives.

The “disposition effect”

It's a bias related to money and it describes how investors hold on tight to losing assets. The driving force behind this behavior is our fear of regret.

It shows we are very hesitant to sell an asset at a loss and we tend to hang on to it as it keeps dropping in value, hoping it will pick up again.

The “sunk cost bias”

When starting new projects, we tend to have high expectations of them doing well. We put a big amount of effort into them and even if see they don't go that well, we still choose not to opt-out. Instead, we hang on them longer, because we feel regret of leaving a project before it materializes.

We therefore fall into the trap of irrationally hanging on to it in order to avoid regret temporarily.