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How to Mend a Work Relationship
Crafting a shared narrative
- What went wrong? Find out from the other person, then offer your own perspective. Don't get defensive.
- It's about us, not me or you.
- Reflect on your positive history, your shared successes, as well as how you worked through hard times together.
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Strong work relationships
Workplaces are communities. Healthy relationships can be a source of energy, learning, and support. When they break down, they become sources of frustration that harm people and organizations.
Reset the emotional tone
When we notice some tension in your work relationships, it is better to reset the emotional tone rather than pulling away. Do this by bringing up positive memories with your colleague, which can strengthen your bond and counterbalance the negative feelings so you can express them effectively.
The purpose is to create a supportive environment where you can talk about the issues without creating further damage to your relationship.
Re-establish a positive emotional tone
- Raise the issue. "I know that we are not seeing eye-to-eye on this issue right now, and it is upsetting for both of us, but I'm really optimistic we can work this out."
- Suggest a time out or try a brief topic change.
- Commit to a shared relationship goal. Agree that your relationship is important and that you both want to restore mutual positive feelings.
- Craft your shared narrative to increase the willingness to forgive and reconcile. Reflect on how both your actions contributed to the failure. Assume the best about the other person's intentions.
Crafting a shared narrative
- What went wrong? Find out from the other person, then offer your own perspective. Don't get defensive.
- It's about us, not me or you.
- Reflect on your positive history, your shared successes, as well as how you worked through hard times together.
Build relational agility
Be willing to try new ways of interacting with each other, known as relational agility.
- Plan to improvise. Think ahead to potential objections to ensure you can respond in the moment.
- When the unexpected happens, pay attention and get curious Instead of getting defensive, ask yourself "why?" Try to pinpoint what is triggering for you. Strong reactions tell us that the other person feels under attack.
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Begin from a place of curiosity
Lean into the conversation from a place of curiosity and respect (for yourself and the other person).
Even when the subject of the conversation is difficult, the interaction can ...
Listen and observe
You don’t actually need to talk that much during a difficult conversation. Instead, learn to listen, reflect and observe.
Be direct
Address uncomfortable situations head-on by getting right to the point.
Foster an honest and respectful discussion and make sure both parties speak about the details of an issue.
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See Relationships Like A Therapist
Relationships nowadays are regularly in the doldrums, with certain factors that tend to ruin them. These same factors can be ‘reverse-engineered’ to help us strengthen and improve these relations.
Validate, Not Solve
When someone talks about their problems, we are jumping in the problem-solving mode straight away. While dealing with people, this approach can backfire. A better approach is to just listen and validate their struggles, make them feel heard and understood.
Actions Have Underlying Functions
Many times, the external appearance of behaviour isn’t the full story and has underlying functions. It is just a symptom and not the problem.
Example: When a teenager is mad for no reason, it helps to understand the underlying problems they usually have in this age, and be compassionate.
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Working Remotely
There is ongoing turbulence in the workplace due to the uncertainties provided by the new virus, resulting in a whole lot of people working from home. Normally the work-from-home policies are esta...
Common Challenges of Remote Work
Even high-performing employees can face a decline in job performance and engagement when working remotely. This can be due to:
- Lack of face-to-face supervision, which leads to a two-way communication gap and even mistrust.
- There is a delay in the procurement of information as remote workers aren’t able to sense the atmosphere and real-time events at the workplace, leading to a lack of ‘mutual knowledge’.
- A sense of isolation among remote workers, leading to a feeling of less belongingness within the organization.
- Distractions at home due to unplanned work-from-home transition, with employees balancing childcare and many other responsibilities along with work.
Improving Engagement And Productivity
A few specific, research-backed steps that can be taken to improve the engagement and productivity of remote employees:
- Establishing Structured Daily check-ins, by establishing a daily call or touchpoint.
- Providing several different communication technology options, using virtual communication tools like Slack, Zoom, Microsoft Teams etc., and making use of video conferencing.
- Establishing clear rules of engagement for communicating with the coworkers or the managers, according to the levels of urgency.
- Providing opportunities for remote social interaction by talking about non-work activities, thereby reducing the feeling of isolation among remote workers.
- Offering encouragement and emotional support by listening to the workers, acknowledging their stress, and keeping their needs and issues in focus.