Crafting a shared narrative - Deepstash

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How to Mend a Work Relationship

Crafting a shared narrative

  • What went wrong? Find out from the other person, then offer your own perspective. Don't get defensive.
  • It's about us, not me or you.
  • Reflect on your positive history, your shared successes, as well as how you worked through hard times together.

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Begin from a place of curiosity

Lean into the conversation from a place of curiosity and respect (for yourself and the other person). 

Even when the subject of the conversation is difficult, the interaction can ...

Listen and observe
Focus on what you’re hearing, not what you’re saying. Genuine attention and neutrality encourage people to elaborate.

You don’t actually need to talk that much during a difficult conversation. Instead, learn to listen, reflect and observe.

Be direct

Address uncomfortable situations head-on by getting right to the point.

Foster an honest and respectful discussion and make sure both parties speak about the details of an issue. 

Don't Avoid Conflict
  • We tend to avoid conflict because we believe that it is bad, yet we continue to create it despite the fact.
  • Conflict isn't essentially a bad thing. It gives us the information we need to know so that we could work with others more effectively to improve our relationships with them and to grow as individuals.
  • In every conflict resolution phase, we must aim for: a solution, a plan, or an understanding.
Gem Statement

A gem statement is a statement that allows the opportunity to open up a new conversation with the hopes of compromisation and a solution.

This usually involves expressing your emotions with the main issue beneath all the surface anger or any other emotion being experienced while having a positive impact on the other.

See Relationships Like A Therapist

Relationships nowadays are regularly in the doldrums, with certain factors that tend to ruin them. These same factors can be ‘reverse-engineered’ to help us strengthen and improve these relations.

Validate, Not Solve

When someone talks about their problems, we are jumping in the problem-solving mode straight away. While dealing with people, this approach can backfire. A better approach is to just listen and validate their struggles, make them feel heard and understood.

Actions Have Underlying Functions

Many times, the external appearance of behaviour isn’t the full story and has underlying functions. It is just a symptom and not the problem.

Example: When a teenager is mad for no reason, it helps to understand the underlying problems they usually have in this age, and be compassionate.