The Positive Side of Shame
Guilt is a private feeling of regret about something you did, and the discomfort leads to self-regulation regardless of exposure.
Shaming is about the possibility of being exposed to an audience.
SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
Shame is that uncomfortable sensation we feel in our stomach when we realize our irrationality and cannot run away from the judging eye of other people. It usually happens when we violate the social norms that we and the community we live in, value.
Shame is a universal emotion, its affect on mental health and behaviour are not fully known, and new studies point out that it has a strong link with depression.
Forgiving someone can reduce our stress levels, risk of heart disease and mental illness. It can prevent cognitive decline in later life, help you earn more money, and be happier.
Forgiveness is part of every culture, but how we choose to offer forgiveness are affected by our cultures and our personal psychologies.
Individualists use forgiveness to relieve a burden and clear their conscience while collectivists use forgiveness to preserve social harmony, even if the individual still feels resentment towards their transgressor.
Western countries like the US or the UK tend to have more individualistic cultures, meaning personal gain is put before helping the wider group. In collectivistic cultures like Asia and Africa, the group is put first.
The separate types of forgiveness are sometimes used to explain the difference between collectivistic and individualistic approaches.
Where lying is concerned, we just can't seem to help ourselves.
We lie for two reasons: behavioral conditioning and cognitive evolutionary biology.
Lying keeps us hooked because we enjoy the reward. The outcomes are unpredictable.
Lying is reinforced every time we get away with it.
Lying is a valuable tool in our survival kit. We can spare someone's feelings or build social standing. Lying can keep us out of trouble or even save our lives.
Practicing deception starts as early as six months of age such as fake crying or laughter. But people only start to get good at it after another four years where they learn to let go of the unbelievable lies and settle for what kind of lies work.