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Three Star Leadership | Wally Bock | Leadership: Make Those Tough Conversations Easier

Tough conversations

If leadership is your job, you can’t walk away from them. Because they're part of your job.
These are conversations about performance and behavior. Most bosses dread them.

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Three Star Leadership | Wally Bock | Leadership and the Art of Confrontation

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When you become a boss you become someone responsible for the performance of a group. In that instant, you become the designated confronter. Some people will behave poorly. Some will underperform. Someone needs to confront them about it and you're it. Others may choose to, but it's your job.

Key Idea

The Art of Confrontation

Develop relationships with your team members: that way both of you are more willing to listen.
Don’t put it off.
Choose a private and safe place.
...

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Three Star Leadership | Wally Bock | Leadership: Do it naturally or do it wrong

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Art Jones was the best leader I ever saw up close. Here's how one of his peers described him. "When Art comes to work, it's like he puts on his slippers. He doesn't look like he's doing much, but lots of good things happen." If you're the leader, your work is important.

Key Ideas

Don't take credit

Bad leaders take credit for the good things and pin any blame for bad things to others.

Good leaders let the credit go to the team and team members. They only call attention to themselves wh...

Don't call attention to yourself

Your task is to help your team and team members do good work. You should understand that the mission is important, not you.

As a leader, you’re just there to make things work better.

Your coaching style

Coaching should be your primary tool in leading. If your coaching sessions seem more like you’re the therapist and your team member the patient, you’re doing it wrong.

Your team members should pay attention to how it will be different in the future.

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Three Star Leadership | Wally Bock | Leadership and Listening

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"God gave you two ears and one mouth, and you should use them in that proportion." My mother said that. I suppose lots of mothers did. It's great advice, especially if you're the boss. There are three reasons that listening well will help you lead more effectively. Here they are.

Key Ideas

Leadership and Listening

Listening is a critical leadership skill you can master.

It will help you learn about the people you work with, demonstrate you think they’re important, and help you make better ...

Listening will help you lead more effectively

When you listen, you learn: about your teammates and what’s important to them, ideas, stories, concerns.
Listening sends the message that you value the other person.
Listening helps you make good decisions: it slows you down so you can diagnose effectively before you act.

Learn to Listen Well

Show that you’re paying attention. Lean in. Make eye contact. Nod.
Paraphrase what the other person said and ask them if you got it.
Ask open-ended questions to encourage them to continue and increase your understanding.
Take notes during the conversation if it helps you and doesn’t make the other person uncomfortable.