Meaningful connections

When wanting to encourage healthy communication, start by making sure that everybody participates in the conversation. This is one of the safest ways to ensure deeper connections and meaningful communication within groups and not only.

We keep hanging on the outdated promises that no longer serve us, or are no longer relevant. They also take the shape of excuses we have kept frozen inside our minds for decades.

• Identify the stories you tell yourself that no longer serve you, inviting others in the conversation.
• Set up an accountable pattern of change, keeping your friends/family in the loop.
• Make a promise which is known to your loved ones, for answerability.
• If some promises need to be broken, do not hesitate.
• Get back up and on track after a setback.

Whenever you think about self-love, try picturing yourself making a mistake. Forgiving your own mistakes instead of overreacting to them is what self-love looks like.

Sell-love is deeply connected to our relationship to the ones around us, as we are definitely shaped by our experiences. On the other hand, we have what we call self-sufficiency and self-reliance, terms that define the relationship one has with himself or herself, without involving anybody else.

"Self-love is less about the ability to withstand loneliness or establish independence and more about awareness and acceptance of our incompleteness. It’s about letting others love us even when we feel unlovable because their version of us is often kinder than our own. "

It's useful to agree in advance to call a “timeout” or “press pause” before arguments begin.

It will give you the time to work through what happened. Because arguing when you are in a low emotional state is not going to help you.

Ask yourself these questions: “What if the other person had a point? What if I wasn’t being honest with myself? What if I wasn’t taking responsibility for something?”

This will provide a new lens through which you'll see the situation. You might realize that there are things you could take responsibility for, that you were probably ignoring based on your initial triggered response.

The structure of most working environments punishes people for efficiency and rewards them for looking busy. We need to shift our focus from the number of hours spent on something to the quality generated.

To make a 3-hour workday feasible, design the right environment to make it possible.

• Behavior is the result of environment. If you have many apps open, you’ll be more likely to be distracted.
• Eliminate the need for willpower. Think of willpower like a bank balance. For every decision you make, you spend a unit. Design the right environment, so you avoid depleting all of your willpower.

It helps to keep an eye on the long-term benefits and roles of the future. Leaders need to be transparent and help people in their organization understand where the world is heading in the next 3 to 5 years.

There is a need to transition the company culture as the current leadership roles are no longer sufficient. This is to ensure the company will thrive in the future.

• Just like we create the right learning space for our children at home, we need to provide an atmosphere where people can tinker, learn, fail and grow.
• Failing as an adult is difficult, but is part of the unlearning process. The right environment can make employees feel motivated and empowered while having some amount of challenge and healthy conflict.

Make an effort to be noticed in the higher levels of the company. Show a little boldness in communicating your (perceived) accomplishments to those with the power strings.

Leadership is about theatrics, to pretend to do something which is seemingly useful and to play a role. How we talk, appear, respond and behave in our daily interactions is what creates an image of ourselves in others minds.

Showing that you are confident makes it seem as if you are powerful.

The goal of an effective 1:1 is not an update from your direct report or for you to lay down some instructions. It's a conversation. It's a chance to hear about your direct reports' ideas for your product, their career goals, and possibly their opinion of their performance.

Keep a list of three potential topics ready for discussion. When they say they have nothing to discuss, you can jumpstart the conversation with one of your items.

Your most precious resource is your own time and energy. When you spend it on your team, it helps build healthy relationships.

Your job as a manager isn't to give advice or 'save the day.'' It's to empower your reports to find the answer themselves. If you want to understand what's going on, ask. Let her lead the conversation while you listen and probe.

• Ghosting: Stopping communications suddenly and completely with someone you are dating, but no longer want to date. You cannot face the pain you will inflict, so you make it invisible by disappearing.
• Icing: Making up a reason to prolong the relationship. "I'm too busy." You want the person to hang on and be there if you change your mind.
• Simmering: Reducing the frequency of dates and communication. You know it isn't working, but you like the security of the relationship while you browse other options.
• Power parting: You know it isn't working and end the relationship conclusively. "This isn't working for me. Thank you for sharing your world. I enjoyed our time together and wish you all my best."

Ghosting, icing, and simmering are manifesting the decline of empathy in our society. This encourages selfishness in one party without regard to the consequences of others.

Try to end relationships respectfully and conclusively, even when they were short in duration. Act with kindness and integrity. This allows both parties to enter another relationship with a clear head rather than with insecurity.