Giving someone non-specific help - Deepstash

Bite-sized knowledge

to upgrade

your career

Ideas from books, articles & podcasts.

Giving someone non-specific help

  • Our loved ones often come to us in a moment of crisis. They're losing their job or need to pay someone back. We sometimes feel we have to give money or bail them out in some form. But after a time or two, you become the consistent rescuer while they continue in their unaccountable ways.
  • Boundaries can be used to stop the cycle, but not letting those boundaries slip is hard. If you put your foot down on not loaning money, don't give in. The person you're trying to help will ultimately feel more secure if they know you keep your word. You're also a good role model for consistent behavior.

STASHED IN:

130

MORE IDEAS FROM THE SAME ARTICLE

We cannot control another person's behavior nor change it.

Enabling may accidentally happen when you are trying to help, but after an extended period, you realise that you are really helping.

Many people try to help a loved one make significant life changes but fail. They may try to help a spouse quit smoking or get a roommate out of an abusive relationship. They may feel that if they don't help, the person will come to ruin.

It's easy to get frustrated when a loved one keeps damaging themselves. This frustration can make us guilt-tripping them. But shaming someone seldom works.

3 Reactions

Comment

MORE LIKE THIS

created 8 ideas

I love these ideas because it helps me to change my mental health..

12

Comment

4.95K reads

It's time to

READ

LIKE

A PRO!

Jump-start your

reading habits

, gather your

knowledge

,

remember what you read

and stay ahead of the crowd!

Takes just 5 minutes a day.


TRY THE DEEPSTASH APP

+2M Installs

4.7 App Score