Healing from control

Whether you're the controller or the one being controlled, it is possible to move forward and make changes for the better.

  1. Be wary of their actions and yours. Think about everything you do and ask yourself "what if" you were the one receiving the action.
  2. Be considerate. Remember that the only behavior we are responsible for is our own and the choices we make based on that.
  3. Practice self-reflection. It is important to know what you have to offer and ask yourself what they can help fulfill.
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Love & Family

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Controlling behavior

Control is a way for us to build relationships; it usually begins without any malicious intent but eventually it becomes clear that it isn't a great foundation for a healthy relationship or connection.

Conventionally 3 things make control easier: money, talent, or physical attractiveness.

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RELATED IDEAS

Don't:

  • Make the pain about you.
  • Have a go at them. "Why didn't you...?"
  • Spread gossip. If they ask, forward their message verbatim.
  • Give them advice.

Instead, ask them:

  • What would you like me to do? or What can I best do to help?
  • Would you like me to forward your message onto others?
  • Thank them for letting you know.
  • Support them by keeping their spirits up.
  • Listen and be sensitive to what they have asked.

2

IDEAS

Appreciation Rather Than Judgment

Instead of focusing on what you don't like and trying to change your partner with judgment, appreciate what is wonderful about him/her. This doesn't mean avoiding problems, as it is vital to learn from the difficulties but being judgmental is detrimental to love.

Investment explained

An investment is a gamble: instead of the security of guaranteed returns, you're taking a risk with your money. 

You can invest in Shares, Bonds, Funds, Government bonds (gilts), UK property market or even Farmland, Vintage cars, Wine, Fledgling technology, firms or art.

For most, investing means putting money in the stock market.

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