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Understanding the importance of constructive criticism
How to receive constructive criticism positively
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Respect in relationships
People who have been through divorces almost always say communication is the most important thing. But the thing people with happy marriages consider the most important is a deep respect for their partner as well as respect for themselves.
- Respect means never talking bad about your partner or complain about them to your friends.
- Respect that they have different hobbies, interests, and perspectives.
- Respect that they have an equal say in the relationship, that you are a team.
- No secrets. Respect means you feel safe sharing your deepest, most intimate selves with each other.
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Giving your partner space
If you love your partner enough, you will let them be who they are.
Have your own interests, your own friends, your own support network, and your own hobbies, Overlap where you can, but different interests should give you a lot to talk about and help expand your horizons a...
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Learn to ride the waves
Relationships exist as waves - we need to learn how to ride them. Some waves last for hours, some for months or even years. The key to success is to understand that few of those waves have anything to do with the quality of the relationship.
People lose jobs, family membe...
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Never stop doing the little things in a relationship
Don't ever stop doing the little things, such as saying "I love you"; holding hands during a movie; doing small favours here and there; helping with some household chores.
The little things add up. Don't forget them.
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Be together for the right reasons
The most common reason people cite why their marriage fail is that people marry someone for the wrong reasons, such as pressure from friends and family, being together for image, thinking that love will solve everything.
But what makes a relationship work is a genuine, deep-level a...
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Realistic relationship expectations
Romantic love, though able to make us feel ecstatic at times, is also irrational and temporary.
True love is impervious to emotional whims or fancy. It is a constant commitment to a person regardless of present circumstances. Some days will be a struggle, and other days you will feel like...
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Embrace the change that comes from growth
If there is a bedrock of respect for each individual's interests and values underpinning the relationship, each individual is encouraged to foster their own growth and development. Each individual will evolve in different and unexpected ways.
When you commit to someone, yo...
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Get good at forgiveness
Most successful couples don't resolve all their problems. It comes back to respecting your partner, who will have different values and perspectives on some things. The key here is to abide by the difference, love them despite it, and when things get a little rough, forgive them for it.
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Relationship advice: Get good at fighting
Relationships, like muscles, cannot get stronger without stress and challenge. You will have to fight at times and hash things out. However, it is essential to know how to fight.
- Never criticize your partner's character or belittle them. "You're so stupid" vs "that thing you did ...
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Trust builds intimacy
If something bothers you in the relationship, you must be willing to say it out loud to your partner. Doing so builds trust, and trust creates intimacy. If you cannot trust, you cannot be trusted.
- Share those insecure things you hate sharing with people. You and ...
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Create practical relationship rules
A relationship is not 50/50. We all have things we like to do and hate to do. We all have things we are good at and not so good at. One partner may work harder outside the home, and the other may have a more relaxed position.
Be practical in figuring out the division of labour in...
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A healthy relationship consists of healthy individuals
It is not your partner's responsibility to make you happy. Each one should figure out what makes them happy as an individual, then you both bring that to the relationship.
Every relationship requires sacrifices at times, but problems arise when your happiness is contingent...
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Related collections
Other curated ideas on this topic:
1. Become genuinely interested in other people
This is the most important principle in Carnegie's book. It's about taking the time to learn about other people's interests and concerns. When you show genuine interest in someone, they're more likely to feel like you're paying attention to them and that you value their company.
Tell Great Stories
- You need to have an interesting point to make it worthwhile.
- Your most interesting point should be the last thing you say in your story.
- Keep it short.
- Keep it personal. People prefer stories about people they know.
- The more you ...
Find Inspiration In People
- Ask loved ones what’s the most important thing they’ve ever learned.
- Ask people what they’re grateful for.
- Ask your parents what you were like as a child.
- Join an organization of people making a positive difference in the world.
- Read an autobiography by someon...
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