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These are the reasons why you find something offensive
Taking offense outside personal relationships
We often take offense outside our personal relationships—for example, a comment on Facebook that ridicules or questions something we find important or of value.
We use our values and beliefs to make judgements. Our belief in specific values may be an important part of our identity and explains why we take offense when those values are not respected.
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Key Ideas
Feeling Offended
Taking offence is an experience of negative emotions triggered by a word or deed which conflicts with what is expected or believed to be correct, suitable, moral and acceptable behaviour.
Kinds Of Expectations
- Foreseeable expectations are those which we assume others will know based on our interpersonal relationship with them and feel offended when we see it is breached.
- Reciprocity expectation is a hope that our favors and kind deeds towards someone are repaid by them.
- Equity expectations happen when we want to be treated fairly and equally.
These expectations, values and beliefs are all based on our past experiences.
A Sense Of Entitlement
Believing in our values forms our identity and provides us with a sense of entitlement to feel offended because we feel these 'sacred' values should be respected.
This is amplified by being exposed to a lot of different points of view on social media.
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Key Ideas
Swear words
We will often use swear words to vent some emotion. Swearing al...
Swearing benefits
- Swearing helps mitigate pain.
- Those who speak more than one language, report that swearing in their first language carries a bigger emotional punch.
- A few blue words, uttered in a good-natured way, indicates and encourages intimacy.
- A recent study suggests that people who swear are perceived as more trustworthy.
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Key Ideas
Expectations shape your reality
They can change your life, emotionally and physically.
You need to be extra careful about (and aware of) the expectations you harbor as the wrong ones make life unnecessarily dif...
The (un)fairness of life
A surprising number of us subconsciously expect life to be fair, and we believe that any unfairness that we experience will somehow be balanced out, even if we don’t do anything about it.
If you’re stuck in that mindset, it’s time to get over it. When something “unfair” happens, don’t rely on outside forces to get you back on your feet.
Opportunities don't just happen
One of the most important things a person can do is stick his or her neck out and seek opportunity.
Just because you deserve a raise, a promotion, or a company car, doesn’t mean it’s going to happen. You have to make it happen. You have to put in the hard work, then go and get what’s yours. If we limit ourselves to what’s given to us, we are at the mercy of other people.