7. Listen Closely To Words - Deepstash
How To Be Effortlessly Charismatic

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How To Be Effortlessly Charismatic

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7. Listen Closely To Words

7. Listen Closely To Words

  • By listening closely to what people have to say, you shift your attention from your thoughts to the person speaking.
  • This practice works for social anxiety as well and you can use it to overcome the fear of talking to people. Instead of being entangled in thoughts like "what do I have to say now to impress this person?", or "why did I say that?" which relate to the past or the present, you should focus on what the other person is saying and truly listen to them.

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We Aren't In The Present

  • We spend too much time outside the present moment. 
  • According to a Harvard study, we spend almost 50% of the time we're awake, not thinking about what we're doing. We either ruminate about things that happened in the past or we worry about things that yet have to come.
  • This i...

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2. Focusing on Inner Body

  • An effective escape from the immersion in all kinds of thinking patterns is focusing on what's going inside the body. For example, looking at the tightness of the muscles or focusing on the digestive system.
  • Keeping your focus on the liveliness keeps you in the now and makes you calm...

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3. Touching

3. Touching

  • This is another way to get rid of thoughts. There are many ways to do this-
  • One of them is to simply sit on a chair and observe how the buttocks touch the seat.
  • Another way is to holding a small object in your hand, like a marble, and focusing on how it feels to your fingers....

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6. Awareness of Silence

6. Awareness of Silence

If you listen very closely, you'll discover that the world is never truly silent. You will become aware of the more sophisticated sounds of the environment. The mind becomes very curious of what's happening in the distance, and will focus all its attention on discovering silence in subtlety.

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1. Breath Meditation

1. Breath Meditation

  • Ānāpānasati, meaning "mindfulness of breathing", is a form of Buddhist meditation which we can do in several stages.
  • The first stage is the contemplation of the body- watching the breath and sensations of different body parts.
  • The second stage is the ...

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5. Waiting for the Next Thought

5. Waiting for the Next Thought

Become conscious of your thoughts. And then ask yourself: what will my next thought be? This will bring you to the present moment.

"Try a little experiment. Close your eyes and say to yourself: "I wonder what my next thought is going to be." Then become very alert and wait for the ...

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8. Focusing on Movement

8. Focusing on Movement

  • Instead of spending time in our mind we can focus on daily ordinary movements like walking to the bathroom, sitting down, standing up, or cleaning. We often don't pay any attention to them because they're a frequent occurrence.
  • This takes our focus away from excessive thinking and di...

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4. Reciting Mantras

4. Reciting Mantras

  • A mantra is a sound, that could be sacred in nature, and could also consist of a word or several words.
  • Mantras don't have to be religious and there's no consensus whether a mantra should have meaning or not. But the repetitive nature of engaging in mantras gives the mind something t...

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Listen more than you speak

Socially intelligent people give the person they are speaking with their whole attention.

The fastest way for people to like you is by showing them that you like them. You can do that by really listening to what they are saying. Ask questions and listen. You may be surpris...

Forgetting to Listen

Forgetting to Listen

Some people interrupt, roll their eyes, and rehearse what they're going to say next instead of truly listening and attempting to understand their partner. This keeps you from seeing their point of view, and keeps your partner from wanting to see yours! 

Don't underestimate the importance of...

Listen for Understanding

As the person shares feedback with you, listen closely. Allow the person to share their complete thoughts, without interruption. When they’re done, repeat back what you heard.

Avoid analyzing or questioning the person’s assessment; instead, just focus on understanding his ...

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