1. Focus On How To Change - Deepstash

1. Focus On How To Change

To criticize constructively, frame it in a way that the focus is on the change that needs to occur and the benefits of implementing it without resorting to accusations or derogatory tone and comments.

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Constructive criticism clearly describes the behavior that you want changed. Examples:

  • Don’t say they are irresponsible, provide the dates when they have come in late.
  • Don’t say they are disrespectful, reference how they roll their eyes and sigh.
  • Don’t say they need to be more of a "team player," explain the specific behavior that you expect.

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Constructive criticism’s aim is to strengthen people, not to tear them down. Focusing on the issue or the behavior and not the person helps with that.

Explain the impact the behavior had on the business. Coming from a place of collaboration and support helps keep that bridge of communication.

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Real feedback is actually about telling the truth without blame or judgment. And the truth always has two parts: something is working, and something could be better. Start with what works, then share the upgrade.

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Focus on the impact of specific behavior and give expected corrections, but refrain from focusing on personality or intent. This causes less hurt feelings.

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If someone brings up an idea you disagree with, don’t shoot the idea down. Doing so can shut down your channel of communication and make others less likely to share ideas in the future.

Instead, focus on building a culture of collaboration to encourage constructive criticism. 

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Praise in public, criticize in private. Feedback loses value when people feel humiliated or embarrassed. So, use the right tone and motive and be constructive.

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One of the biggest misconceptions about constructive criticism is that you must wedge your critique between positive openings and endings. However, this method doesn’t always translate into better performance.

Sometimes a leader has to get straight to the point and offer guidance on how flaws can be overcome.

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Most people give feedback by making broad-based claims without providing evidence. Broad-based claims are interpreted as character evaluations and tend to be harmful.

Constructive criticism highlights things can be changed and provides some indication of how to change them.

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  • Choose words that do not put the receiver on the defensive.
  • Use "I" messages, like “I’ve noticed”, rather than "you" messages, like “you always.”
  • Keep your emotions out of it, as they can derail your message.
  • Maintain dignity by giving choices where possible.

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If you want to criticize to help someone improve their performance, approach it from a place of how you would want the information communicated to you.

Stay factual to avoid an emotional confrontation and make sure you create the space for it to be a conversation (versus a directive) that leads to a positive outcome.

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State your intention, why you’re the one sharing this feedback and how you are willing to help the person learn from it. 

Choose a private place and give them time to understand the next steps. Being proactive, by showing respect and listening to their impression helps to build trust.

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If you use criticism to bash or undermine, it will be harmful. If you dismiss criticism without reflection it will be useless. But if you assess criticism objectively and without emotion, you can discover what's useful to you, and shrug the rest off. 

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Before delivering criticism, consider your emotional state and how the feedback to be delivered impacts all involved. 

Manage your emotions beforehand to obtain the desired outcome. 

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Frame the feedback with the outcome in mind, and prepare the recipient for what you have to say. It never hurts anyone to be told, "I need to tell you something that may be hard for you to hear."

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Feedback

Feedback provides an opportunity to gain insights about a person's personal and professional actions.
Without feedback, we will move in the same direction without realizing our shortcomings. With feedback, we can incorporate outside suggestions and improve accordingly.

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Dr. Seuss

How did it get so late so soon?

It’s night before it’s afternoon.

December is here before it’s June.

My goodness how time has flewn.

How did it get so late so soon?

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Buridan’s Ass

A thirsty donkey is placed exactly midway between two pails of water. It dies because it can’t make a rational decision about which one to choose. A form of decision paralysis.

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