The Best Way to Handle a Difficult Conversation At Work

None of this candor stuff works unless you’re telling the truth. That’s job one. Since the truth can be a bitter pill, we tend to embellish it a little bit, and before you know it, it bears little resemblance to the actual truth.

• That doesn’t mean that you should zing your words with a poisonous arrow, but rather, make sure they are factual, don’t exaggerate to make a point and be kind about it.
• Being honest when you’re sharing will be appreciated. Sometimes it may take a bit of time, but in the long run, your friend or colleague will see it as the caring act that it was intended to be.

Compliment sandwiches don’t really work because everyone knows what’s coming after the first bit of praise. However, there is something to be said for finding the good and highlighting it.

• Compliment, hammer, then reframe the compliment. Ugh.
• It’s important to note is that there is always something good you can point out, even if it’s just the effort or intent. Just because something doesn’t work out or was a flop doesn’t mean everything about it was a fail.
• Find the good and recognize it.

1. What’s the reason for dropping this truth bomb? Is it to address their career growth, their health, their relationship? You need to be crystal clear & make sure it is at the heart of the conversation.
2. Why does it matter to them & why does it matter to you? If you’re telling a hard truth because you’re giving insight that will help them advance in their career, that’s a great reason for them. 
3. You should also address why it matters to you: In this case, the reason for your candor on your part may be that you’ve set a personal goal to be better at developing others instead of throwing in the towel

The bottom line is that once you begin the practice of being radically candid, it will become your new way to operate. That’s likely to be your nerves at play, so just hang in there and you’ll improve.

The more you follow this practice, the more you build that muscle for yourself, but you may also be inspiring others to do the same so they can also become great, candid, communicators.

Keep this in mind:

• It makes sense to address things directly and clearly.
• It’s helpful and honest.
• It’s the right thing to do.