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Assume The Other Person Likes You.
Perspective is an interesting concept — it is a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.
Everyone has shaped their own view of reality, and they perceive the ways that people treat them as good or bad. Even if the intention of the other person is not always to be good or bad. — Your views on the world dictate your behavior. If you assume people like you, you will start behaving more positively, likable, and friendly —
…this will, in turn, MAKE people like you more.
It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
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Confidence and how you ACT
You see it the other way around as well. When you come into an interaction with the assumption that people DON’T like you or that you’re weird, awkward, or a burden on others, you will act in ways that will make people not like you as much.
Honestly, you could argue that all confidence is slightly delusional. So even if you don’t feel very likable, you just need to start deluding yourself.
This is really powerful advice, but I know it can be quite difficult to implement. I’ve been on the other side, so I really do get the resistance to a concept like this.
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The Confidence problem
I am not going to try and solve the “confidence problem” here, because I don’t think I can, and definitely not for more than one specific person, on top of that, the person who knows the most about this problem and has the best chances of solving it right now is the one reading this idea.
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Try it
I do think though that you should try this method out — assume that your friends like you and your company, that you aren’t annoying them, and that they want to hang out with you more. LIE TO YOURSELF WITH INTENT, the brain is separable, it can outplay itself, understand itself, and increase the efficiency of different parts in it, it’s not only safe to ACT but its borderline genius.
It would be a lot more beneficial to assume your friends all love you until proven otherwise, and not to assume that they could be pissed off at you and need them to constantly prove that they are not.
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Expand
It could be expanded to all people, as well — if you assume that everyone you meet is going to like you and wait to be proven otherwise, it will improve your confidence, your social comfort, your sense of humor (critical to which is the confidence of delivery and the relationship between the joker and the audience), and your self-esteem. Why wouldn’t it? Everyone in the whole world will like you and have an awesome conversation with you if you talk to them!
Share your thoughts in the comments — And follow for more :)
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IDEAS CURATED BY
A Geek | SM enthusiast | Entrepreneur | Writer/Curator | Visionary | Product designer (UX/UI)
CURATOR'S NOTE
Assumptions, Confidence, Acting, and your better self.
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Ohad Sack's ideas are part of this journey:
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