4 Keys to Developing and Maintaining Friendships - Deepstash

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4 Keys to Developing and Maintaining Friendships

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/friendships_b_2957789

huffpost.com

4 Keys to Developing and Maintaining Friendships
As the old saying goes, you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose. That is, unless you've developed some really close friendship! We need friendships in our lives to supplement our existing romantic, marital or family relationships.

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Develop and maintain friendships

  • Look for friends with common interests. 
  • Schedule a "first date. There is nothing wrong with inviting someone for coffee or dinner because you think you have so...

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Essential for our survival

Friendships need to be carefully acquired to avoid negative influences. Friendships need a continuous effort that can be difficult to manage. They will go through ups and downs and will be subject to time pressure and geographical constraints.

However, our ability to form friendships is critical and a fundamental part of who we are.

Advantages of friendships

Friendships create diversity. Your chances of dealing with certain problems are increased if you have friends with different skillsets.

  • For instance, the death of a partner. Your survival is dependent on having close friends who can support you through difficult times.
  • Friends with different interests, strengths, and weaknesses provide a safe space to help us test our ideas and develop our character.
  • Friends with different talents can help us realize our own potential.
  • Our life expectancy increases with a network of reliable friends.

A key component of success

If friendship becomes another checkbox on your to-do list, you're probably going to miss out on good friendships.

If we put in some effort into learning how to become a good friend, the rest will come easier. With friendships, we live longer, with more laughter, less fear, and a higher quality of life.

Close friendship

To be best friends, you are committed to always be on standby. It's not that hard to be there for someone when you can physically be there, but when you're separated by state or time zone, you have to figure out a new way to be close.

Keep creating shared experiences

When you see a friend regularly, you develop a collection of shared memories. You will also have an intimate understanding of what they're up to generally. If you're separated long-term, those experiences will shrink.

It's important to create something you share with the other individual, not just exchanging information about past experiences. The more opportunities you give yourself to connect, the more organically you'll get to know your friend's new life.

It's going to take more effort

The idea that you can sustain a friendship and pick up right where you left off after long stretches of silence is a myth. A relationship grows stronger through nurturing.
Although long-distance hacks can work for a time, there's no replacement for in-person interaction. It's more expensive and more of a hassle, but it's the best way to recharge a long-distance friendship.

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Support, trust, and honesty

Friendships are built on mutuality and reciprocity — be there for her, so that she will be there for you.

If you can’t be straight with her or feel the need to hide your actions or tell untruths, the relationship is being built on shifting sand and won’t be able to withstand any real challenges.

Listen to your friends

Friendships require attention and tending — if we don’t truly know what a friend needs, and if we don’t clearly state what we’re feeling or needing ourselves, friendships just won’t survive.

Ditch the judgment

Assume the best and give your friend the benefit of the doubt. If you’re quick to assume the worst and ready to lay down blame, you’re not going to be the kind of friend that anyone wants for the long haul.