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Sharpen up Your ‘Argument Etiquette’ by Letting Someone Else Win for a Change

https://medium.com/the-post-grad-survival-guide/sharpen-up-your-argument-etiquette-by-letting-someone-else-win-for-a-change-78fe92e9b455

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Sharpen up Your ‘Argument Etiquette’ by Letting Someone Else Win for a Change
You argue your case (very well I’m sure), but you can’t seem to get through to them. It feels like you’re talking in a different language. You explain it in the simplest way you know. Often several…

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The Fallacy Of Arguments

The Fallacy Of Arguments

The fallacy of our seemingly perfect argument lies in the fact that we assume that the other person is reasonable and logical, just as we are. That is not true in both cases.

Most of us have gotten into an argument where no matter how hard we try, we cannot seem to get through the other person. Our perfectly logical and easy-to-understand explanation isn’t enough to close the argument, and that feels frustrating.

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How Confirmation Bias Influences Our Communication

  • When we confront new information, we interpret it to support our existing beliefs. Any thought or discussion that confirms our prejudice and thought patterns seems appealing to us and is known as confirmation bias.
  • When we try to argue our case (because of course, we are right!) it strengthens the defence of the opposition.
  • However wrong it seems to us, their arguments are correct too according to the confirmation bias they have experienced, which has solidified their point of view.

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Figuring Out Your Opponent's Point Of View

Get into the other person’s shoes and figure out why their point of view is so important for them.

Conflict is almost inevitable in an argument due to both the parties ‘doubling down’ on their confirmation bias. Instead of going the way of souring your relations, a better approach is to have an open mind and simply understand the other person’s point of view.

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Right And Wrong In An Argument

Arguing with someone generally means that only one person can win by default, a productive and healthy debate can mean there is a good amount of learning for both the participants and the aim is to have a positive outcome benefiting all.

The subject of right and wrong is itself subjective, and the differences lie in what is significant and crucial for the individual. If we can understand this and learn the opposite sides of the issue, then we can work towards resolving the conflict.

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Argument Etiquette

When engaging in a debate, here are a few things to take care of:

  1. Empathize with the other person’s point of view.
  2. Try not to make the debate a ‘he-said-she-said’ slinging fest, and keep it productive and solution-based.
  3. Do not argue in an email or text message, as it makes one lose the power of hand gestures, facial expressions, and the intonation of our words, which can change the context of the statements.
  4. Take a break and cool down, if it seems the conversation isn’t going anywhere.

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Know your facts

How many times have you made a claim about some piece of trivia only to realize, as soon as you’ve made that claim, that you’re completely wrong?

Stop and think before you make such errors, and y...

Switch perspectives

Stepping into the mindset of those you argue with allows you to figure out what’s influencing them. 

Showing empathy will lower the temperature of the debate and allow both of you to come to a resolution.

Try to appear open-minded

If you appear to be giving the other side’s position a thoughtful review, then the solution you propose will seem to be far more sensible. Furthermore, your opponent may come to your side without you having to do anything other than listening.

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Convince Them With Confidence

  • Speak confidently, be concise, and try not to repeat yourself. 
  • Give the appearance that you truly know what’s right from the beginning, even if you don’t have all o...

Avoid Common Argument Fallacies

Winning an argument often comes down to who can go the longest without contradicting themselves and keeping sound logic, not direct persuasion of the other party.

Anecdotal Fallacy

Using a single personal experience as the foundation of your argument or your big piece of evidence. 

For example, your phone may have broken right after you bought it, but you can’t use that to argue that those phones are not worth the purchase for others.

Logical Fallacies

Logical Fallacies

Logic is fundamental to most of humanity’s knowledge, but there are common fallacies in logic and reasoning, errors of judgement which happen due to:

  1. Our assumptions based on what we...

Correlation And Causation

If two incidents or things happen at around the same time does not mean that one thing is the result of the other. Often many things occur at the same time yet are completely unrelated.

A correlation of data, like:

1) Increase in social media usage, and

2) Increase in anxiety and depression

does not mean that one set of data is caused by the other.

The Slippery Slope

The Slippery Slope fallacy is a mistaken belief that one relatively mild unaddressed problem or allowance will automatically lead to other negative consequences.

The mind races on to the next negative consequence like a downward spiral, creating fear and anxiety.