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Wise People Have Rules For Themselves
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Patterns in successful people
Wherever they excel, they tend to have personal rules that they take very seriously:
- Financially effective people tend to hold themselves to certain rules about money.
- Fit, energetic people tend to have personal rules about health.
- Productive people keep personal rules about work.
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Setting standards
Your quality of life improves when you set clear standards for how you live.
You gravitate back towards “so-so” in any area where your standards are unclear.
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Dismissing self-discipline
For example: brushing your teeth every day doesn’t require any sort of forcing or obsessing, just dental hygiene standards you consider non-negotiable.
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"Losing" freedom
We’ve all experienced the pain of living under unfair or unsympathetic rules, especially the ones imposed on us as children by teachers and grownups.
We fear the prospect of losing any of our freedom, and we tend to think of rules as devices that only constrain.
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Self-imposed rules aren’t constraints
They’re good decisions made in batches—they’re behavioral boundary markers you get to position yourself, through your own experience and wisdom.
Despite our fear of rules, the feeling of acting in accordance with a well-considered personal rule is actually a palpable feeling of power and independence.
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Money rules to increase your net worth
- Don't spend all your income at once: the easiest way to grow your bank account is NOT to spend it all.
- Know how the Economy works.
- Avoid debt; personal debt destroys your net w...
It takes more time to make money than to spend it
You work thousands of hours to make a certain amount of money. And then, you can drop it all on a new car, luxury vacation, watch, or anything else that you desire.The easiest way to grow your bank account is NOT to spend it all. It’s solid advice. The ancient Stoics knew about this too. True freedom means you desire less.
Know How The Economy Works
Why do economies generally collapse? What’s debt? Who prints money? Why do they print money?You don’t have to be an economist. The point is that basic knowledge about how all this stuff works prevents panic. “Oh shit! The market is down! What now!!” Panicking will not help you.
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Journaling approaches
- The Gratitude Journal: Simply write about something that you’re grateful for.
- Morning Pages: Before starting work each day, write 3 pages, long-ha...
What you write, you learn
The key to learning is to stop passively consuming information and start actively engaging with the ideas we encounter.
One effective way researchers have found to reinforce learning is through reflective writing: It promotes the brain’s attentive focus, boosts long-term memory, illuminates patterns and gives the brain time for reflection.
What you write, you control
- Recording your thoughts in a medium outside your own head helps your mind to become quieter: It stops returning to the same worn-out mental loops over and over.
- When you recount and reflect upon your thoughts and experiences you are, in effect, telling your own story. Journaling helps us clarify, edit, and find new meaning in these narratives.
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Unresolved conflicts
The idea that couples must communicate and resolve all of their problems is a myth. The truth is, trying to resolve a conflict can sometimes create more problems than it fixes.
Being honest
The last person you should ever have to censor yourself with is the person you love.
It’s important to make something more important in your relationship than merely making each other feel good all of the time. The feel-good stuff happens when you get the other stuff right.
Being willing to end it
Romantic sacrifice is idealized in our culture.
Sometimes the only thing that can make a relationship successful is ending it at the appropriate time, before it becomes too damaging. And the willingness to do that allows us to establish the necessary boundaries to help ourselves and our partner grow together.