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Emotional Intelligence Needs a Rewrite

http://nautil.us/issue/83/intelligence/emotional-intelligence-needs-a-rewrite-rp

nautil.us

Emotional Intelligence Needs a Rewrite
You’ve probably met people who are experts at mastering their emotions and understanding the emotions of others. When all hell breaks…

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Emotional Intelligence: The Assumptions

Emotional Intelligence: The Assumptions

Emotional Intelligence(EQ), or the ability to be able to identify and respond to the other person’s feelings is a soft-skill based on two flawed assumptions:

  1. It is possible to detect or gauge the emotions of the other person accurately.
  2. Emotions are triggered by outside events and can be controlled by rationality.

New studies find that faces and bodies are not the perfect communicators of a person’s emotional state, and one cannot control someone’s emotion using logic, making the traditional understanding of Emotional Intelligence outdated.

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The Neuroscientific View Of Emotional Intelligence

A scientific way to define and understand emotional intelligence is to view your brain as a construction, an on-the-fly builder of thoughts, emotions, and perceptions.

The reflex-like emotional reactions are just the tip of the iceberg, and the brain is constantly shape-shifting itself and processing the sensory inputs that are received into useful predictions and actions.

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Emotional Granularity: Becoming An Emotional Expert

If the brain has a large, flexible range of diverse emotions in any given situation, it’s emotional intelligence is wide-ranging and finely tailored. This ability of a flexible, emotion-rich brain is called granularity.

Real emotional intelligence means understanding that sometimes feelings and emotions cannot be distilled and expressed using a predefined slot. Emotional granularity is the coming-of-age of the decades old understanding of EQ, now evolved and unfolding its many facets.

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Emotional Intelligence( EQ/EI)

Is the measure of an individual’s abilities to recognise and manage their emotions, and the emotions of other people, both individually and in groups.

Benefits of a higher EQ

  • Ease in forming and maintaining interpersonal relationships and in ‘fitting in’ to group situations.
  • A better understanding one's own psychological state, which can include managing stress effectively and being less likely to suffer from depression.

IQ and EQ

There is no correlation between IQ and EQ scores.

IQ has no connection with how people understand and deal with their emotions and the emotions of others (EQ). 

You simply can’t predict emotional intelligence based on how smart someone is.

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Emotional intelligence (EQ)

EQ is the ability to be able to recognize and regulate your own emotions, while also empathizing with others and maintaining an awareness of their reactions.

EQ can be developed with p...

Know thyself

Having a deep understanding of yourself provides you with more accurate perceptions of how you are coming across to others. 

To increase your self-awareness, make an effort to reflect on your strengths, developmental opportunities, triggers, values, and the like so that you are intimately familiar with what makes you tick. 

Be open to feedback and criticism

Weighing feedback can help you guard against blind spots. It can assist you in recognizing if your behaviors are having the effects you are intending.

If they aren't, you can adjust your actions or apologize accordingly (or mindfully choose not to do either).

What Emotional Fitness is

It's the idea that in order to lead healthy, happy emotional lives we need consistent habits and exercises that support our mental health and wellbeing.

The Benefits of Emotional Fitness

  • Decreased stress: you learn to manage your triggers.
  • Better communication in relationships: it helps you to tolerate and manage difficult emotions and then find more productive ways to work through difficulties.
  • Decreased anxiety: you train your mind to stop fearing its own emotional reactions.
  • You stick with your goals: you learn to deal with emotions like anxiety, shame, regret.
  • Increased self-awareness: you learn to build a better relationship with your emotions.

Get to know your emotions

  • Emotional clarity: Taking the time to deliberately reflect on our emotions, to observe and label them.
  • Emotional myth-busting: Eliminating myths and misconceptions floating around people’s minds about emotions. 
  • Emotional tolerance: Learning to resist short-term gratification and instead invest in long-term values.