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What makes strangers click?

https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20200917-what-makes-strangers-click

bbc.com

What makes strangers click?
Conventional wisdom says people are drawn together when they’re most similar. But how you navigate the world together might actually be what ignites the spark.

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Making sense of the world together

Making sense of the world together

This is the secret of really good conversations.

Many of our best conversations, whether with people we have just met or with old friends, are about the world around us rather than ourselves. These are also often the conversations that bring us closer to each other.

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C. S. Lewis

"What draws people to be friends is that they see the same truth. They share it."

C. S. Lewis

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Experiencing shared reality

The theory of shared reality implies that we are most likely to feel closer to each other when we turn our mutual attention to something beyond ourselves.

So the responsibility of keeping the conversation going falls how on the way we engage in the world, cultivating our curiosity and priming our awareness. This means that whether we’re talking to a person we don't know, a partner or teammate, we’ll always have something to talk about.

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  • Stay focussed on the one thing that you're upset about at this moment. Don't end up talking about other things.

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Practice self-care as individuals

Your disappointments in your partner often reflect your disappointments in yourself. Your acceptance of your partner often reflects your acceptance of yourself. 
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Stand together

Don’t let outsiders run your relationship for you. If you’re having an issue with your partner, work it out with THEM and no one else.  

The relationship is unique

Don’t compare your relationship to anyone else’s – not your parent’s, friend’s, coworker’s, or that random couple whose relationship seems perfect.  Keep in mind that all relationships have their ups and downs.

Focus on what you two share, and make your unique bond the best it can be.

Manage your feelings when in a relationship

Anger and frustration can result in great harm when expressed. When you experience these feelings towards your partner, try to calm down before starting a quarrel, which would only just injure your...

A balanced relationship is a happy relationship

As you most probably know, making sure there is balance at every level in your relationship will only strengthen your connection with your better half. Therefore, take all the necessary steps to ensure that whenever one of you has a bad day, the other one is there to cheer him or her up.

Efficient communication within a relationship

Whenever you feel like asking something to your partner, try saying it in a polite and affectionate way, avoiding reproaches while making sure that you set the direction of your relationship up for success.