How Do You Forgive Even When It Feels Impossible? (Part 1)
Curated from: psychologytoday.com
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Forgiveness
By forgiving, you are accepting the reality of what happened and finding a way to live in a state of resolution with it.
This can be a gradual process—and it doesn't necessarily include the person who wronged you.
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Why forgiveness is so hard
- You're filled with thoughts of retribution or revenge
- You enjoy feeling superior
- You don't know how to resolve the situation
- You're addicted to the adrenaline that anger provides
- You self-identify as a "victim"
- You're afraid that by forgiving you have to re-connect—or lose your connection.
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When you desire to forgive
If you decide you are willing to forgive, find a good place and time to be alone with your thoughts.
- Think about the incident that angered you. Accept that it happened, how you felt about it and how it made you react.
- Acknowledge the growth you experienced as a result of what happened. What did it make you learn about yourself, or about your needs and boundaries?
- Think about the other person. When you were hurt, the other person was trying to have a need met. What do you think this need was and why did the person go about it in such a hurtful way?
- Decide if you want to tell the other person that you have forgiven him or her.
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IDEAS CURATED BY
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