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Identify the person who has affected you negatively.
Identify the specific behavior that damaged you. Consider the person as a whole with positive and negative behaviors. The person is not the behavior, but the behavior is a part of that person.
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Any feelings that are attached to the damaging behavior need to be brought to the surface.
If you feel safe communicating with the person who hurt you, talk about your feelings or write them to him.
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Many of us have anxious and negative attachments to people who have hurt us in the form of anger, hate, resentment, irrational guilt or shame.
Removing the negative attachment through forgiveness will make you feel liberated and open you to the positive that life has to offer.
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Make sure you rebuild a place of safety for yourself by having clear boundaries with the person who wronged you.
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We tend to avoid facing our deep emotions since they make us feel anxious, at first.
Understand that it may be so in the beginning but in the end, it will be more liberating. Be patient with the process.
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379 reads
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